So Friday was the fly day and a mirth day
(Not just for players on the juice,
cause The Manny’s back and Braun is loose),
and even if it’s not quite Earth Day
It was in fact the birthday
Of dear old Dr. Seuss.
The Lorax became a movie
Which kinda rhymes with SUV
A most ironic celebration
Of branding integration
But a $70 million opening is groovy…
Like the groovilous glove of the Once-Ler
With a distinctive hole in its finger
It served him all right
But it’s a much different plight
For the one worn by David Wright.
Sam’s-A-Fan and a fan is Sam
But it’d be even cooler if he swam
In a Mets injury pool with dibs
On David Wright’s bruised ribs
Aww wham bam thank you ma’am.
If such a pool existed
Wouldn’t it be twisted
If you were a believer
In something called Desert Fever
And had Ike Davis listed!
Yes, spring baseball is finally apace
And the Yankees are two and oh
While castoffs AJ and Montero have taken more balls off their face
Than a video shot in San Fernando.
You must not hop on Pops, either old man Stargell or David Ortiz
And certainly don’t hop on Big Papi’s knees,
And in the Red Sox clubhouse the beers are no longer flowing.
While in Detroit and playing DH, you can bet that Prince will keep growing.
A Lakers/Heat Finals would be the picks
Of everyone in Bristol
So am I the only one hoping for Clippers/Knicks?
(well, me and Billy Crystal)
But yesterday the Lakers beat the Heat
With Kobe wearing a mask
While Linsanity has cooled a beat
As if you had to ask
And might things get exciting in Brooklyn joints
as Nets fans wonder what they saw…
Did Darren Williams drop more points
Than sponsors dropped Rush Limbaugh?
Speaking of New York–Boston rivalries
The Rangers beat the Bruins
One team is looking pretty good, but with apologies
to Cheesy, the other looks a bit in ruins.
In football the Saints defenders were counting bounties. ..
But their bounding bonuses will be docked
And other D’s are being clocked
Because of course the commish is shocked.
I’ve got a new appreciation for Dr. Seuss
For writing books like Thidwick The Moose
While I resort to stupid tricks
Like simply making limericks
And I apologize to him for such abuse.
I’m sure Theo Geisel could meet The Matts’ demands
But as for me I’m off to relax
I’ll leave you readers in good hands
For tomorrow’s Grote2DMax.
Filed in: West Coast Craig