Grote’s Gripes: Notre Dame v Alabama, Blow By Blow[out]

Bama Flips Off Notre Dame

Notre Dame v Alabama: Tide Flips Off Irish

MIAMI, FL - Last night’s game between the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame and the Crimson Tide of Alabama was one of the most anticipated college football games I can recall.  I spent the past two and a half weeks at my father-in-law’s house, who graduated from Notre Dame in ’58, so that probably added to the hype.  The man’s license plate simply reads “ND.”  Amazingly, I bought into the hype and believed Notre Dame had a chance to win this thing.  Oh well, congratulations to the state of Alabama who has won the BCS championship game 4 years in a row and to the University of Alabama who now hold a record 10 national football titles.

Writing about anything else but this game would be foolish even though the NHL lockout is over and the most controversial baseball Hall of Fame ballot results are about the be released tomorrow.  Here is my live blow by blow recap of the blowout as it happened:

7:30 - The wife wants to unwind before the big game so she insists on watching Access HollywoodBieber smokin’ a blunt?  Why Jason, why?!  It’s Roll Tide not Roll Blunts.

8:00 - Why do they say the game starts at 8:00 on the Kickoff is 8:30 so the wife gets to watch a half hour of The Bachelor.  Why is it that women like to watch some douche bag (this time the douche’s name is Sean Lowe) dump dozens of women over the course of a season?  This game better be worth it.


Desiree Proved The Night Wasn’t A Complete Loss

8:30 - Damn, I was just getting into The Bachelor when we have to switch over for the opening kick-off.  I hope Sean picks Desiree, she is super cute and spunky.

8:35 – 7 – 0 Alabama.  The Crimson Tide caps a 82-yard drive with a Lacy touchdown.  Maybe I can get back to The Bachelor sooner than I thought.  Who said Sean was a douche bag?  He’s dreamy and family oriented.

8:45 - Notre Dame gets screwed on a fair catch interference call after recovering a fumble.  If anything, it was a block in the back penalty on Alabama.  ND needs these calls to go their way to make this game close.

8:53 – 14 – 0 Alabama.  Crimson Tide takes advantage of the penalty and shoddy tackling by ND to drive for another easy TD.  So far Manti T’eo is tackling like Womanti T’eo.

8:59 - Another questionable call against Notre Dame is being reviewed.  This time it is called a fumble on the field then reversed.  Before the reversal the wife wonders whether we should record the season premiere of Bunheads from 9 – 10.  I’m not ready to give up on ND just yet.

9:11 - Seriously, 911.  Someone call emergency; there is a manslaughter going on.  End of first quarter with Alabama leading 14 – 0 and on the ND one-yard line ready to go in again.  Too bad for you suckers who have 1 – 0 in the box pools.

9:15 – 21 – 0 Alabama.  I don’t think the heavy stuff is going to come down for quite a while now.

McCarron's girl, Katherine Webb.

McCarron’s girl, Katherine Webb.

9:20 - Notre Dame makes it into Tide territory but eventually turns the ball over on downs at the 39.  Baby steps.

9:24 - Kirk Herbstreit says ND linebacker Carlo Calabrese was “literally shooting downhill” while making a tackle.  We seriously need better gun laws.  Obviously anything goes in Florida.

9:39 - ND punt returner catches ball inside 5-yard line and gets tackled immediately.  At least he didn’t fumble the ball like he did last time.

9:55 – 28 – 0 Alabama.  Tide scores again.  Bama’s Lacy has ND soiling their under-alls.  Five minutes left in The Bachelor, think I can catch the rose ceremony and head off to bed.

Stay tuned tomorrow for Angry Ward who will be a little less Angry after the Notre Dame beat-down.

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  • DannyBax

    What about at 8:50 or so when Brent Mussberger creeped everyone out talking about the QB’s girlfriend?

    • Meet The Matts

      After seeing her pix, we’d be a lot more creepy than ol’ Brent.

    • Cam_James

      This whole situation reminds me of when i tried to steal Chase Daniel’s Girlfriend at Mizzou. I knew that as soon as he turned pro they would break up. unfortunately once an athlete chaser always an athlete chaser. After they broke up she decided to date the token white guy on the basketball team.

      • Cam_James

        This McCarron GF will have a kid by Cromartie in no time once McCarron flames out of the NFL.

        • buffalobilly84

          I knew he was a flamer! haha ;) But the Bills will draft him – watch!

    • Grote2Dmax

      She enters beauty pageants wearing bikinis on stage so therefore she is open game for the Brent Musburger’s of the world to gawk at her.

      • Amy2ndRow

        Gawking is fine but don’t go on a creepy tangent on national tv!

  • AngryWard

    Roll Tide.

  • Junoir Blaber

    I didn’t even realize the NHL Lockout was over. This is how far gone I was as a hockey fan. As for the game, I was really rooting for ND, I just hate Bama and extremeness of NCAA Football they stand for.

  • Cheesy Bruin

    All you need to know about last night’s game is ND had to go for a first down on 4th and 5 at the 45 a minute and a half into the second quarter. The Irish were grab-bagging it in the second quarter. There’s no mercy rule in NCAA football?

    • Grote2Dmax

      That fair catch interference penalty hurt – ND would have at least kept it competitive until the beginning of the second quarter.

  • The Public Professor

    I don’t know who McCarron is. And you know why I don’t know who McCarron is? Because he has zero hope of being a pro QB.

    It’s official: Nick Saban is king of the minor leagues.

    • You Suck

      He has a hot girlfriend so he is somebody. What do you have?

    • Junoir Blaber

      ‘Bama fells a bit like Duke in Basketball. All the great college players end up being meh in the Pros!

  • Cheesy Bruin

    Alabama looked infallible, young fella.

  • Sam’s-A-Fan

    It’s just another example of the rich getting richer. When you consider all that Alabama has in education, culture, economy, hygiene, teeth…oh, wait?

    Roll Tide.

    • Grote2Dmax

      Is Indiana much better?

  • WestCoastCraig

    Mussberger was reduced to saying “Gunga, galunga. Gunga…gunga galunga.”

    • Grote2Dmax

      Big hitter the Burger.

  • AngryWard

    I haven’t seen a bunch of catholics take a beating like that since the movie “Heaven Help Us.”

    • Grote2Dmax

      Alabama hasn’t given out beatings like this since Wallace was in office.

  • AngryWard

    Oh, and, Roll Tide.

    • Cookies Corner

      Just when I thought ‘Call Me Maybe’ was the most annoying phrase ever, we now get ‘Roll Tide.’ ‘Bama Tide/Tide Detergent advertisement in three-two…

  • Sam’s-A-Fan

    I just heard that the line KG used to get under Melo’s skin so successfully last night was “Your froggin wife tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios!” Now apparently there are a lot of “interesting” possible meanings for Honey Nut Cheerios in the current vernacular, but whatever it means trashing talking about someone’s wife is usually a sure bet to get a reaction.

    • AngryWard

      Garnett is a genius.

  • vinny from brooklyn

    bama’s offesnsive line is better then the jets line and jesse palmer is better then mark sanchez.

  • Johnny Rox

    Not a College Football fan
    Started watching the game last night
    Notre Dame receiver makes a great catch
    Left foot inbounds when he catches the ball
    Right foot comes down CLEARLY inbounds
    Only one foot inbounds needed in College ball
    Refs call no catch???

    Then Bama player calls lame fair catch signal
    Gets run into by his own player
    Drops the ball
    ND recovers
    Penalty on ND
    Bama gets the ball + 10 yards
    I turned it off, no sense in watching that!

    I was wondering what the replacement refs were doing?
    Now I Know!


  • Doc Diz

    God dang Bama looked good…wonder if McCarron will follow the lead of other great Tide QBs like Bart Starr, Joe Namath and Ken Stabler….Sweet Home Alabama, Roll Tide Roll…

    • AngryWard

      So it’s now okay to include an extra “roll”? I like it.

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