Horse Box Diplomacy: Fans of Yankees, Red Sox, Orioles Bond Against…

You a Horse?

Horse In A Box =? Yankees, Sox & Os vs…

On Sunday I found myself in a horse box. I know you don’t know what that is and quite frankly, neither do I. While it does sound vaguely erotic – like a device you might find in a whimsical pleasure dungeonit is not that… much to my chagrin.

The Horse Box simply put, is a no frills, quaint little bar in Manhattan’s east village (13th and A if you must know). I go there very sparingly – usually to watch some terrible sporting event on one of its six TV’s. It’s never very crowded, except when one of said terrible sporting events does in fact draw a crowd. It’s the favorite bar of one of my roommates and it makes sense… it’s the only Baltimore bar in the neighborhood. That’s right. Baltimore.

Man Down!

Man (Moose) Down!

The coolest thing I ever saw in that city was in 1998 when Mike Mussina took a Sandy Alomar Jr. come backer off the face. My parents and I could hear his nose and eye socket break from our seats down the left field line. To his credit, the Moose didn’t scream… because he was unconscious face down on the mound. If memory serves me correctly, that same night Boog Powell signed a free hat I was given at the gate, which I promptly lost the next day on the log flume at Busch Gardens. Good night.  Great ballpark.

But I digress… So here I was with both of my roommates. One from Baltimore, screaming about the virtues of all things B-Mo: The Ravens, The O’s, The Wire,  the USS Constellation, yada, yada, yada.

082307_gisele_300X400The other, a gentleman born in western Canada and raised in Boston of all places. As irony and misplaced/uncalled for racism would have it, I guess that makes him a Canadian Beaner… Of course he’s a huge Sox, Pats, Bruins fan with an obligatory Tom Brady Fat Head behind his bedroom door, so you know he’s cool.

Both men, proudly and without concern for judgment, wore long sleeve shirts of their respective football teams. I on the other hand, a Jets fan, wore a casual sweater…because Jets fans are sweater people now.

As we drank beers, played darts and watched the Knicks/Heat game, I realized that these few weeks between the Super Bowl and Opening Day is the only time of the year that the three of us don’t have any good AFC/AL East material to rag on each other about. It’s the calm before the storm.

One of the TV’s showed the Phillies/Blue Jays spring training game. We watched as Aaron Cook tossed three lazy fastballs to Jose Bautista, reaching a 2-1 count. Almost simultaneously, we all said, “He’s going yard this at bat.” Sure enough on the next pitch, Cook threw a fat batting practice fastball right down the middle, which Bautista promptly parked in the left field seats.

Monster squad?

The Common Enemy

The three of us, Yankees, Orioles and Red Sox fans respectively, looked at each other, mouths agape.

Our differences momentarily put aside. Our collective enemy in the AL East, found.

Stay tuned for next time when the other guys weigh in… And Angry Ward tomorrow, of course.

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About the Author ()

Evan "Pickles" Achiron is a George Washington University grad and Strategic Communications honcho who likes the Yankees, Jets, Rangers and Knicks. He also dons 'the tools of ignorance' when playing hardball with Cam James & Short Matt. He comments on this site as ACK7. You can also follow him on Twitter: @each_iron.
  • Downtown Derek

    I’m down with this I hate Baltimore and like drinking in hole in the wall bars.

    • Meet The Matts

      Who hates Baltimore?!

  • Cheesy Bruin

    Evan, the Public Professor is a NY Yankee in the Duke of Earl’s (Weaver) court. Sounded like a trip down memory lane as I used to be an Orioles fan back in the 70′s and 80′s. Would’ve loved to have been there.

    • Meet The Matts

      Typical Bruins fan flip-flopping on teams!
      “I used to be an Orioles fan [when they were good. Now I'm a S.F. fan.]“

      • Cheesy Bruin

        The player’s strike ended baseball for me way back when.

  • Cam James

    What was the bar’s murder rate?

    • Randy Levine


      • ACK7

        Pretty sure it’s hovering at about 0, considering it’s all hipsters, and people who like lax.

  • Sam’s-A-Fan

    Man, I thought we were going to talk more about the ponies, or at least Ikea meatballs?

    • Meet The Matts

      C’mon, SAF!

      • Sam’s-A-Fan

        I was just basing my assumption on the title of this stellar piece.

  • AngryWard

    Question: Can anyone who has a Tom Brady fathead in his bedroom be called a man? Sounds like there’s still a bit of growing up to do there.

    • Meet The Matts

      Point of the Day!!!

      • ACK7

        I know. It’s quite disturbing.

      • ACK7

        Actually the most valid point I’ve heard in quite some time. He also has a Canadian flag hanging above his bed. Essentially, it’s the worst room I’ve ever seen.

  • bosoxbruins04

    Pretty strange how now Baltimore is back on the sports map. Funny that you guys all bonded.

    • Meet The Matts

      They bonded for 30 seconds.

      • ACK7

        It’s true. We bonded for approximately the amount of time it took Bautista to trot the bases.

  • SentFromMyBlackberryWireless
    • Meet The Matts

      It’s not the fall, it’s the sudden stop.

      • Cam James

        The is a metaphor for the entire Yankee’s organization. The Pride comes just before the fall.

        • ACK7

          Maybe it’s like a show biz thing. Maybe someone told him to “break a leg” this year and ya know, this happened.

          • Cam James

            If that is true then someone needs to tell A-Roid to run through a corn field backwards then jump off a cliff

  • Preacher’s Corner

    1. Establishing a Common Enemy is the best way to strengthen friendships (Sun Tzu’s Art of War). Common Ground is also a bar down the street from Horseshoe box.
    2. Baltischmore? Never been there and not sure what state its in. (I put it in the same category as Philthydelphia.
    3. Brady did score a ‘home run’…*Giselle*
    4. Lastly, what about those Braves?! ;)

    • Meet The Matts

      5) How is a team in the AMERICAN League East from Canada?!

  • Meet The Matts

    Evan “Pickles” Achiron: You go to a dive bar and don’t invite us?! Dang… Mussina had the “gay” tag for a while with the Yankees. Being quiet, well-groomed and good-looking gets people saying that kind of stuff – we get it all the time. Whatever he is/was – the guy could pitch.

    • ACK7

      How did this whole post turn into a Mussina bash?

  • jgclancy

    Baltimore?…meh, don’t hate it but don’t see any reason to go there unless I’m driving through to Florida

    Well–I’ve made it to 50 years of age….my childhood may be over! Everyone should have a drink today…
    Go Aztecs! Go A’s! and Go Go Godzilla!!

    • Sam’s-A-Fan

      Well dagnabbit, being a devout Yimnastic, I should have told my boss I needed today off to celebrate the holiday; with booze and bacon of course!

      Jim, I’ve always gone by the philosophy that you’re only young once, but you can be immature forever.

      Happy Birthday!

      • jgclancy

        Yiminites everywhere are celebrating. Thanks Sam. I always (when I had a real job haha) took the day after my birthday off…..I usually needed that day more. I will be having my bacon cheddar cheeburger( medium rare) and one or two Blue Moon’s as always.

        Gooooooooooo Knicks!

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