NIAGARA, NY – We woke this morning to find that Junoir Blaber’s column was not posted. After going through the regular steps when such an occurrence takes place – like seeing if it wasn’t scheduled to publish or there was some issue with WordPress, we put “Writer Down” protocol into place. But alas, our phone calls to the seediest of the Bronx’s gin mills proved fruitless. Then finally, faster than you can say Malaysian Black Box, we got a beeping sound… Actually, a ringing sound – on the MTM Emergency Hotline for Missing Writers… It was Blaber.
He. Was. Alive.
But barely… or barely sober.
See, he went to his Niagara University Rugby Alumni Game this weekend at his alma mater, Niagara University, and was calling from the Emergency Room in the town’s hospital. Seems he was over-served and then fell into a Hangover IV muck of blurred recall. And this was at 8 AM this morning!!! Something about falling… not being allowed to sleep… and yes, still going to post… yet still drunk.
We can’t wait!
In the meantime…
The NY Rangers lost to the Flyers, as their power-play and penatly-kill failed King Henry. That series is now notched at 2 games apiece…
Then there was a Curtis Granderson sighting at Shea Field… as the NY Mets did the unthinkable and rallied for a win in the 9th… at home! The Marlins are investigating – they smell something fishy taking place and while the Kardashians were in the park, it was not them.
And finally, the Yankees and their suddenly shabby/old pitching staff lost to the Orange County Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim and their equally over-paid and aging lineup. Even Poo-Holes went yard – seems he’s got a little “juice” in his step and swing this year. 39-year-old Hiroki Kuroda served up two taters and couldn’t make it through five. Hank Steinbrenner puffed on a Pall Mall and mouthed the words, “Ruh-roh” from his box. Stay tuned…
Come back tomorrow for a man that pens voluminous tomes in ERs, Cheesy Bruin.
Filed in: Matt McCarthy