Grinding Ax: Can the Knicks and Rangers Be Great Again? Dolan Trump Donald?

22 Comments

LAKEWOOD, NJ – Perhaps our favorite Leprechaun, James Dolan, should swipe a page out of the Book of Trump.  Just like America, the New York Knickerbockers can be great again!

Don't thank me MSG fans

Don’t thank me MSG fans

Hey, some of the groundwork is already in place. With NO Mexicans currently in La Liga,  no wall would have to be constructed around Madison Square Garden.  That’s not to suggest that a barrier of some form should not be designed to keep Carmelo Anthony out. They just may be able to have Melo pay for his own exit.

Zen Master Phil Jackson needs a running mate ( head coach) to drive his Triangle Offense. He failed miserably with disciple, Derek Fisher, who needed the best players to pull that off… Trump would get The Best! Unfortunately for Big Phil, Donald’s suggestion is: Phil, You’re Fired! Dolan likes to burn Benjamin’s, but he will never do that.

What’s the solution?

CHornswoggle Phil_Jackson James_Dolan Jon_Niese Meet_The_Matts2onsult an NBA Outsider! Easier said than done. First thought that came to mind was to find someone who is cerebral and cunning… Bill Clinton, perhaps?  After some thought, that would not work, though, as he mentored Isaiah Thomas on how to manage women in the front office!

How about Kobe Bryant?  He can relate to Carmelo; Narcissistic , ball-hogging achiever who has won under the Zen Master. Imagine if the Knicks were able to get Bryant and if Kobe could lure King James to the Big Apple if LeBron wins the championship for sorry-sack Cleveland? Now that’s Winning! LeBron James craves the spotlight. If he succeeds in grabbing another ring, he can leave town without guilt and go to another town to make them great again! Hell, they would have players begging to be part of the reconstruction. The Garden would once again be the Mecca of Basketball, not the NBA equivalent of… Wrigley Field.

On to the New York Rangers!

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How do we make the Blueshirts great again? Incite into the obvious, points the first shot at Glen Sather. This guy is still pulling the puppet strings in this show. He needs to go.

Mark Messier would make the Rangers GREAT AGAIN!  

The Blueshirts have now watched their championship potential disappear during the remodeling of MSG. Out the door went key members the team could not afford, due to that salary cap albatross named Rick Nash.  

Messier would need a mentor. Who better than the Mad Man who showed them greatness? Get Mike Keenan back as special advisor. He’s crazy, brilliant and not afraid to make changes. He could use some big name bait to lure another dumb team into trading for Nash. For instance, put these guys on the table: Dan Girardi, Marc Stahl and yes, King Henrik Lundquist. All three would still command skilled talent in return, even though they are all aging and displayed diminished production this year.

"I said go this way"

“I said go this way”

Our King without a Crown, looked better in a suit than he did between the pipes this past season. As The Donald would probably say, “He was no Mike Richter” Tough times need tough measures. Speaking of which…

Chime in all you Hillary and Bernie fans! And come back tomorrow for Hubit Chakockov.

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About the Author ()

“Grinding Ax” Walter Hynes (GAW) comes from the same Sports Royalty bloodlines as Short Matt… He’s heaving hatchets off the heads of any deserving Sports Personalities… His favorite teams are the NY Rangers, Detroit Tigers, Dallas Cowboys, NY Jets and Manchester United… A suburban husband and father of two, Walter understands what it takes to be a second-guessing, sideline-heckling parent and coach.

  • Robin Puck Goodfellow

    If you trade Lundquist you are trading your home run hitter or deep threat that can change any game or series. He makes the Rangers an unknown. He is the entertainer we pay to see.

    • GrindingAx

      We love Hank but we need to win

      • How dare you?! Wait till Aunt Saint Peggy hears your blasphemy!

        • GrindingAx

          Regarding Henrik or Hillary,?

      • Junoir Blaber

        You don’t trade Hank, you trade everything around him.

    • Robin… Welcome to Mattville! You comment is as right as A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

  • AngryWard

    Nothing can help the Knicks. Not even if Jeff Hornacek suits up and starts firing up threes. The best they can do is right the ship and make the playoffs. But in the East, what does that mean? Look at what an easy road Cleveland has had to the Finals. The East is a joke, outside of Lebron and Co. Other than maybe Houston, I’d say just about every team that made the playoffs this year in the West could have easily advanced to the Eastern Finals. The Knicks should just hire a bunch of carnival freaks and assorted giants and at least try to be entertaining for the next decade or so.

    • GrindingAx

      Greatest show on Earth? I thought they were banning elephants…

      • The Knicks need a midget and the World’s Tallest and Shortest Man.

    • Junoir Blaber

      James Dolan is his own barker.

  • Different Matt

    What the Rangers need to do is lure JD back. He can do double duty as Rangers GM and color commentator.

    • Jack Daniels?

    • GrindingAx

      GM…JD should be the GM

      • Junoir Blaber

        Where is JD? I miss JD and Sam Rosen in the both.

        • GrindingAx

          JD is currently president of the Columbus Blue Jackets. Perhaps the Rangers can trade Nash back to them for him .

  • Cheesybruin

    Kobe as coach? Stranger things have happened in this city is all I’m saying. He can be player-coach also.

    • Kobe and Michael can’t coach because they never can empathize with sucking.

  • AngryWard

    Jeff Hornacek’s daughter is hot. Good hire, Phil!!

    • Randy Levine

      She can Horn my cek any day!!!!!! 😉

      • Okay… A-Dubya is onto something here but let’s not dismiss #CharlotteMcKinney just yet.

        • GrindingAx

          Guys,. She like fourteen ….see you all in jail..

          • AngryWard

            She’s outta college. This is the most tasteful photo I could find.

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