Angry Ward Wednesday: Mets Flying, Knicks not Dying, and NFL Has Me Crying

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BRONX, NY – Your long national nightmare is over. After a one-week hiatus, Angry Ward Wednesday is back! This week I’m gonna try (*TRY!*) to stay positive among all of the negative… never an easy task for me. On top of this, I am eating a salad while penning this post, which is a way scarier “end of days” indicator than anything happening in this election cycle. Anyway, let’s start things out with something fun.

Mets on a Plane! A good friend of mine put this hilarious animated short on the 1986 Mets on my radar a week ago. It’s about the team’s flight after clinching the NL title in Houston. With a short running time, and narrated by the likes of Strawberry, Gooden, Dykstra, and Mitchell, I assure you it is well worth a look.

Don’t Nix the Knicks Just Yet. Look, ask anyone, I’m the last person to defend the New York Knickerbockers, except when JG Clancy and I are winning an easy free brunch off our own Junoir Blaber (still unpaid). But I don’t think Knicks fans should be jumping off the 2016-17 bandwagon so quickly. They were never going to be the “Superteam” that Derrick Rose hilariously predicted, but they can still turn it around enough to be competitive in the East, especially when they figure out how to play D and someone reminds them that games are 4 quarters. Hang in there Knicks fans! Tune in to Clyde’s suits until the team straightens themselves out.

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NFL on Earth. This season continues to resemble one long God-awful Adam Sandler movie. Officials blowing calls right and left, coaches who can’t coach, kickers who can’t kick (I’m looking at you Minnesota Vikings) and once-great teams that can’t even beat beatable teams in their home stadiums. It’s a mess. Besides New England, Atlanta and Dallas I’m not even sure who is worth watching. The Raiders maybe? Has it come to this? You ever see a picture of Al Davis’s son Mark, who now owns the Raiders? No? Here ya go. Moe Howard is rolling in his grave while slapping Curly silly and yanking Larry’s hair.

I was going to write more but election results are coming in and I can’t help but watch a little bit of coverage before switching over to a movie. I’m sure management can insert a nice little postscript here regarding said election.

Come back Thursday for Buddy Diaz, who is making America Meet The Matts great again. Wait… were we ever great?

 

 

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Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, "Don't have a enough short, white angry guys but I don't dislike them... that much." A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.

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