Angry Ward Wednesday: No Column, But Free Booze! And Power Play Girls

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BRONX, NY – To me, there’s nothing all that compelling to write about. Ben Whitney handled the Mets and Yanks current status earlier today. The NHL playoffs died for me after the Caps/Pens series ended. Seriously, who cares about Nashville, Anaheim or Ottawa? And no one outside of Western Pennsylvania can want to see the Penguins win another Cup. What’s left? The NBA Draft Lottery? I’d sooner pass a kidney stone. NBA Playoffs? Please, I’ve talked about the Warriors so much that even I’m sick of it. And Cleveland will absolutely trounce Boston. Book it. How about a comprehensive rundown of the upcoming French Open? No?

Babes and Booze on ice!

Look, I’m open to suggestions here. In fact, let’s make this interesting. Talk about anything you like in the comments section today: sports, movies, politics, food (I’m looking at you, Clancy), whatever drifts in and out of the transom of your mind. Let’s see where it goes. I’ll even make it more interesting. I’ll happily give up a $150 gift certificate to lovescotch.com that’s been burning a hole in my pocket, to whoever comes up with the best thread. I’ll have to ask Management, if those things are *transferable though. They gotta be, right? Booze must be transferable. We need to be able to give each other booze now more than ever.

Tanaka and his puppy.

Whatever the case, I’ll chime in with some of my own thoughts as time allows. Though, for this week, I’d much rather counter-punch off of you guys.

Come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz who I am quite certain doesn’t think that Masahiro Tanaka will win the Cy Young this year.  And you can find us on Twitter at @Angry_Ward, @MeetTheMatts & @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and our Facebook page, Meet The Matts.

*Management says no but reserves their right to “change their mind.”

 

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Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, "Don't have a enough short, white angry guys but I don't dislike them... that much." A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.

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