Angry Ward Wednesday: Mike & the Mad Dog, NBA Summer League Basketball, Vick on Kaepernick

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NEW YORK, NY – If there’s one thing I’ve learned over my Alcatraz-like sentence here at Meet The Matts, it’s that the more thought and effort you put into a post, the less likely anyone is to care. Over the past couple of weeks I’ve seen several MTM contributors come up with clever, insightful column ideas, only to met by crickets. I’ve traveled that road one too many times to traverse it once more with four bald tires and a bald head to boot. Instead, let’s just get to some sh!t that just occurred to me.

Mike and the Mad Dog 30 for 30. I’ve got to admit that I’ve never really paid much attention to ESPN’s 30 for 30 film series. But, this past week I cleared my schedule and made an exception for the 30 for 30 on Mike Francesa and Chris Russo, aka WFAN’s Mike and the Mad Dog. I was fairly disappointed. In a nutshell, this doc didn’t really offer anything new to what most people already knew about the famed sports talk radio duo. At best, I was hoping for some real behind-the-scenes dirt on their relationship and show. At worst, maybe a “best of” montage of classic moments. But it delivered neither. It was a fairly predictable hour, outlining the rise and fall of their sports radio partnership. I got much more enjoyment out of this excellent piece by Nick Paumgarten in the New Yorker almost 13 years ago. It’s really good. Give it a read if you get a chance.

Bobby Valentine, Mad Dog Chris Russo, Mike Francesa, Meet The Matts

NBA Summer League Basketball. The NBA, ESPN, and everyone else who thinks Summer League basketball games are some big showcase, and worth hours of dissection and discussion, have got to be kidding! It’s nothing more than yet another transparent attention grab by a league desperate to generate any kind of interest in anything outside of the maybe four teams that have a shot of winning it all next year. Turbo-charging the already obnoxiously loud Lonzo Ball hype machine serves no other purpose than to 1) get morons to think he’s the second coming of Magic Johnson and/or 2) tear the kid to shreds when he doesn’t live up to expectations. Bottom line, you can see equally entertaining summer basketball on the playgrounds of New York and other cities, and the only trash talk you have to listen to is coming from the players, and not TV suits.

Here’s how most REAL summer league games get settled.

and last, and most certainly least…

White enough for you?

Mike Vick Thinks Colin Kaepernick Needs a Haircut. He’s since backtracked on this “hot take,” but apparently former NFL quarterback and animal lover Michael Vick thinks that out-of-work NFL QB Colin Kaepernick can start getting back into the good graces of NFL plantation o… er… NFL owners, by cutting his hair. This is just brilliant on so many levels. I honestly think there’s a Michael Vick advice book in here somewhere: Mike Vick’s Hail Marys for Desperate Athletes. Ray Rice can get back in the NFL if he would just start holding the elevator for people. Donald Sterling may buy the Clippers back once he finishes watching 1,000 hours of Sanford and Son and What’s Happening reruns.  Roger Clemens will get inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame the moment he dies tragically saving a calf from raging flood waters. Seriously, I smell a bestseller.

That’s it for today. I’ve devoted .10% more thought than I had originally planned. Come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz, who’s always ready to sing the National Anthem and give 110%. And you can find us on Twitter at @Angry_Ward, @MeetTheMatts & @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and our Facebook page, Meet The Matts.

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Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception… he’s flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, “Angry Ward’s ‘anger’ is a direct result of “Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan.” As if that weren’t enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, “Don’t have a enough short, white angry guys but I don’t dislike them… that much.” A-Dubya is MTM’s longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.

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