MARLBORO, NY – Last week I bored you with my UNDER win totals in the NFL for the fast approaching 2017 season. While I find it easier figuring out who will downright suck, here are my four teams that will exceed Las Vegas’ expectations and cash our tickets at the same time.
NEW YORK JETS (4.5) Not a typo. I’m not drunk or concussed. We are, after all, talking about the J-E-T-S and as a few of our MTM pundits stated, only gangrene Gang Green can “f**k up f**king up.” However, there is a huge window of opportunity early in the season for the Jets that will go a long way into whether or not they get to the magic number of five double-ewes. After opening with two road games in Buffalo and Oakland, the Jets play winnable games in Weeks 3 through 5. A home opener against Jay Cutler and his Dolphins precedes another home game against the Jacksonville Dumpster Fire and The Mistakes By The Lake. I’m also not saying the season opener against the Bills is an automatic “L”–Buffalo has a new coach and system to comprehend and last I checked Las Vegas has them listed at 7 wins. What I’m predicting is the Jets players and coaches make like the Cleveland Indians in the movie Major League and ride the momentum of unity against all those that say they aren’t built to win and are tanking as an organization. Somehow, someway, the Jets get to five wins and I’m throwing in a Joe Namath guarantee with it!
CLEVELAND BROWNS (4.5) This pick comes on the heels of news that the-color-of-horseshit Browns. are shopping overpaid and under-worked QB Brock Osweiler and seem to be happy with the play of second-round pick QB DeShone Kizer, so much that the rookie may start the season under center. This is a one-win team from a year ago but Las Vegas is tipping us off that there are better days ahead, as they set the win total where they did. The Browns are my surprise team this year with a nice O-line, running game and a very underrated head coach in Hue Jackson. The arrow is also pointing down for division opponents Baltimore and Cincinnati and only increases the chances of getting to five wins.
LOS ANGELES CHARGERS (7.5) The team moved north and will call a 30, 000 seat soccer venue home until their official stadium is ready for occupancy. I don’t know what effect if any the small crowd will have on the players but the team cleaned house after a 5-11 season and played much better than the record would indicate. The offense will remain intact with Offensive Coordinator Ken Whisenhunt, while Gus Bradley takes defensive control and Anthony Lynn handles the head coaching reins. I think there’s enough talent and brains on board to get to 8-8.
DETROIT LIONS (8) I’m basing this selection on schedule alone, as the Lions will play against the so-so divisions of the NFC South and AFC North. They won nine games last year and can improve on that record provided they find a running game.
Come back tomorrow for a man who bleeds Buffalo blue, DJ Eberle. And please follow us on Twitter – @CheesyBruin & @MeetTheMatts, @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and like our Facebook page, Meet The Matts.
