Big Ben NFC Playoffs Special, MC Hammer Helps Separate Pretenders and Contenders

#NFC Playoff Special, MC Hammer helps separate Pretenders & Contenders?! @BenWhit8 Reports on @MeetTheMatts
This guy could've helped the Eagles secondary on Sunday

MISTLETOE, KY – It’s almost Christmas, so you know what that means. We’re just a few days away from one of those “What your favorite sports team wants for Christmas” columns. You know like The Mets functioning groin muscles; The Yankeessomeone to remove dents on the sports bar in center field.  But this week I’m looking at a head scratching NFL Week 15, featuring another catch/not a catch deciding home field advantage in the AFC. When the dust settled, the NFC playoff picture got a little clearer. I think. Let’s see if we can separate the wheat from the chaff, whatever that means. In honor of M.C. Hammer’s 50th birthday (whenever that was), let’s look at three teams rising, three falling, and three still punching, assisted by some horrific lyrics by the great MC.

Three Teams on the Rise – 2 Legit 2 Quit

I’m shakin like a quake and funks
Get devoured I choose to abuse, misuse and confuse
Competitors who think
They’re makin up all the rules, fools

MVP Candidate?

Rams: I can’t say I saw the bludgeoning of the Seahawks coming.  This one may have put Todd Gurley in the mix for MVP while knocking Russell Wilson out.

Vikings: Sure, it was an easy one on Sunday as the Bungles have all but quit. Still, the Vikings did what they had to do and this game was over early. Case Keenum is forcing the Vikings to change their plans and the defense is one of the league’s best.

Panthers: That was an impressive win against a revitalized (temporarily) Packers squad. With Greg Olsen back in the fold, the Panthers suddenly have a lot of weapons on offense.

Three Teams Falling – Turn this Mutha Out

He’s gonna beat me,
say yes to the master and I will teach thee
Turn this mutha out

This guy could’ve helped the Eagles secondary on Sunday

Seahawks: They abandoned the running game early in this one. DangerRuss Wilson needs help. Doesn’t anyone want to win the MVP this year?

Eagles: They won, but it took three blocks (PAT, FG, punt) and a questionable non pass interference call against Evan Engram (possibly the season’s lone bright spot for NYG) to beat the lowly Giants. The secondary was exposed. Nick Foles looked pretty good, but wait until he plays an NFL defense.

Packers: By the time you read this, if Atlanta won, the Packers are out. Aaron Rodgers looked poised to pull off a patented comeback until Geronimo Allison fumbled away their season. Allison was in there because Davante Adams was concussed from a cheap hit on an interception. The field is relieved, as no one wants to see Rodgers in the playoffs.

Three Teams Still Fighting – Pray

All my life I wanted to make it to the top
(That’s word, we pray)
Some said I wouldn’t
They told me no, but I didn’t stop
(That’s word, we pray)
Working hard, making those movies everyday
(That’s word, we pray)
And on my knees every night, you know I pray

Falcons: After the Bucs on Monday, they finish with tough games at New Orleans and then home versus Carolina. The Falcons will not be backing in. If they stumble, three teams are only one game behind them. Still, they’re in good position with a win over Tampa.

The mustache will be watching the playoffs

Cowboys: They pulled out the big win with the help of an index card and one of those touchback fumbles by Derek Carr. Zeke is back, but they finish with tough ones against Seattle and at Philly. Seattle is reeling, but you don’t want to underestimate that wounded animal. I don’t think the Cowboys have the horses, but they’re trending up.

Lions: Flying under the radar at 8-6, the Lions are trying to sneak in. After an easy one at Cincy, they finish at home vs Green Bay. As the Cowboys and Seattle play each other and the Falcons have two tough games, this is a team that can slide in if they can beat Green Bay. And if Green Bay is out by then, maybe they’ll shut down Rodgers.

Come back tomorrow for Angry Ward. That’s word we pray. You can follow us on Twitter at @BenWhit8, @MeetTheMatts, @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and like our Facebook page, Meet The Matts. 

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About Ben Whitney 402 Articles
Ben Whitney comes from journalistic stock. Aside from his brothers, rumor has that his great-great grandfather was the youngest brother of Eli Whitney and covered the earliest "rounders" games. Big Ben is also another New York Rugby Club player/pal of Different Matt, Short Matt and Junoir Blaber. He likes film noir discussions, has twin girls and took up ice hockey after retiring from rugby.