Angry Ward Wednesday: Oakland A’s, Clancy Strays, and the Daily News in Distress

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HIGHLANDS, NC – I’m on vacation in the middle of nowhere. Almost no cell service, limited WiFi access, basically a Millennial’s nightmare. I’m not even all that sure what’s going on in sports. Has anyone on the Mets contracted Bubonic Plague? What’s Trump’s latest lame effort to deflect attention from the fact that Russia owns his ass? Is he lashing out against bunting? (“Losers bunt! I never bunt, and won by the greatest landslide in history.“) Whatever the case, I’m not a big “ignorance is bliss” kinda guy. I like being unplugged at times, just not all the time. Here’s what I got this week.

The Swingin’ A’s. It looks like Billy Beane’s Moneyball ain’t dead yet. Very quietly, the Oakland A’s have crept into contention, and are close to chasing down my Mariners for the second AL Wild Card spot. As always. they are doing it with a bunch of no-names. Jed Lowrie would maybe qualify as the only recognizable “star” on this team. I’ve never had any real problem with the A’s but, if they are going to grab that Wild Card, they’d better NOT reprise their usual “play dead” routine against the Yankees. Next to the Twins, Oakland has done the best job at making the Yankees feel good about themselves in the postseason. They now have a Familia face to help in that endeavor. I’m still hoping that Seattle holds on. Anyway, speaking of the A’s…

Meet_The_Matts -JG-Clancy-Oakland-As-Council-Woman

JG Clancy Permanently Retired??? I have it on good authority that our resident Athletics, Vikings, and fine dining fan, JG Clancy, has permanently retired from the MtM (note the lower case “t” in his honor) comments section. This is a HUGE loss, and I’m not sure what can be done to turn it around. Who will fill the void on those days when we want to take over the comments and steer them towards movies, or what we are eating that day, rather than another piece on who’s going to unseat the Warriors (*Spoiler Alert* No one!) or why the Mets can’t stay healthy. (Am I the only one who thinks the water in Flushing just might be contaminated from years of the chop shops dumping oil and god-knows-what-else into the ground?) Anyway, “Say it ain’t so, JG! Say it ain’t so!” We need you here… especially on Sunday’s to hold Cheesy Bruin accountable. Please reconsider.

Daily News Dismantled. I just read that the New York Daily News, long the left-leaning answer to it’s retarded tabloid cousin the New York Post, has cut some 50% of it’s editorial staff and completely gutted its sports department from a staff of 35 to 9. They now have a total of 5 sportswriters! This is crazy. Meet The Matts now has a larger writing staff than the New York Daily News. I know that I’m an old crank who still likes tangible newspapers, and maybe that’s because the first real money I made was delivering the NYDN with my older brother when I was 8, but putting the news in the hands of the internet has already proven to be an insanely slippery slope. I don’t know if Tronc, the people that own the Daily News, have some bigger agenda, but I do know that New York still needs the Daily News.

OK, that’s all the aimless rambling that’s fit to print. Come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz, who is rapidly becoming one of our most senior writers.

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Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, "Don't have a enough short, white angry guys but I don't dislike them... that much." A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.

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