Cheesy Bruin’s Free NFL Picks and NFL News, Notes, Banter

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BLOOMINGBURG, NY – It’s my Sunday job… to select NFL games according to the Las Vegas point-spread for this most glorious of sports websites. I have a few ideas and titles for our other contributors to write about the NFL: 1) Why Does Monday Night Football Suck So Much 2) NFL Parity? Six Winless And Two One-Win Teams. So far, this football season has sucked… but enough of the negativity! I swept all four selections last week to reach even waters at 8-8! That’s through four weekends of pigskin and Cheesy Bruin’s Free NFL Picks. Let’s build on that.

FAVORITE So league darling Pat Mahomes, Jr. doesn’t throw a touchdown pass and we’re automatically to believe the Detroit Lions stumbled upon how to defend the wunderkind quarterback? Really? The Kansas City Chiefs still scored over thirty points in their last-second win on the road last week, so I guess there’s a way of limiting the Andy Reid offense. Funny stuff. Tonight will be the first of five prime time games where the NFL promotes the new face of football, wearing #15 for the Chiefs. “Who owns, owns, as Denis Lemieux would say, the NFL?” It’s Kay Cee in case you don’t know or agree. The Colts are sacrificial lambs tonight, as this game gets ugly. We’ll find out who the Chiefs back up QB is tonight when they’re twenty plus points ahead in the fourth quarter. The Pick? KANSAS CITY -11 over Indianapolis

UNDERDOG New Orleans bottled up the overrated Cowboys running back (see Angry Ward’s Wednesday post) Ezekiel Elliott in last week’s outright win. The Saints don’t have to worry about stopping the run today because the Bucs have none to speak of in all honesty. Tampa Bay will throw the ball until Jameis Winston’s throwing arm falls off at some point. This is a team that will have problems closing out games due to their inability to run the ball and work the clock. Off of a stunning victory in Los Angeles that saw countless people in King of the Hill go down in flames with the Rams, the Bucs go for the exacta on the road in Nawlins as field goal dogs. Is this the same team that gave birth to the Daniel Jones legacy or the one that is 2-0 on the road thus far? I say the latter. The Pick? Tampa Bay +3 over NEW ORLEANS

Is Lamar Jackson as cool as Sam Jackson?

OVER Lumped into the category of horrible football teams is none other than the local New York Jets. This perennial dumpster fire of a franchise is 0-3 and coming off a much needed rest to stop the bloodletting… but only for a short time. Philthy entertains the Jets in a battle of the green and bettor$ may a$ well take advantage. I’m guessing the Iggles can name the score here and come close to hitting the handicap on their own. The Jets covered last game versus the Pats on the strength of two non-offensive touchdowns. There’s some peril in this selection but we get the money late. The Pick? PHILADELPHIA/New York Jets OVER 43.5

UNDER I saw all I needed to see of the Steelers offense under quarterback Mason Rudolph. It was a gimmick game plan with lots of runs, tip passes, shuffles, bubble screens, and wildcat formations. That crap ain’t gonna work against a better opponent. The Ravens won’t be mistaken for the Bengals. While Lamar Jackson continues his descent from that opening week revelation, there will be limited scoreboard activity in this one. The Pick? BALTIMORE/Pittsburgh UNDER 44

GOOD LUCK!

Speaking of hot streaks, come back tomorrow for Ben Whitney, who is right even when he’s wrong.

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About the Author ()

A man amongst men. Cheesy Bruin kicked cancer to the curb - twice. The Cheese Man's a big, tough teddy-bear who survived the Bronx despite being an unabashed Boston Bruins fan and Sargent-At-Arms for Angry Ward's Urban Spur Posse. Nuff said. Doctors have taken most of this throat and had to make him a new tongue from thigh-meat (his own) and still he won't shut up about the Bruins, Cowboys, Pirates and Cleveland Cavaliers. And yes, his kids do love him.

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