Angry Ward Wednesday: Yanks vs Mets – 2013 Lineup Breakdowns

• February 20, 2013 • 31 Comments

Teixeira Scripps Spelling Bee Meet_The_MattsNEW YORK, NY - Let me start by stating the obvious, the Yankees and their fans have absolutely zero interest in how they match up against the Mets entering a new baseball season. They are far more preoccupied with teams like Toronto and Tampa Bay and Baltimore, though it’s uncertain as to whether they still care about the post-Valentine Boston Wreck Sox. Anyway, Bomber loyalists be damned, it’s still fun to see how the clubs from Queens and the Bronx stack up against each other. Here goes, Yanks vs Mets…

C - Francisco Cervelli vs. Travis d’Arnaud. The Mets will probably start the season with light-hitting John Buck, behind the dish, but how long can that last? The match-up we’re looking at is between two guys who sound like characters in a World War II escape movie. Cervelli has been linked to South Florida performance-enhancers (who hasn’t?) while d’Arnaud is the main piece the Mets got back for R.A. Dickey. Trying to be optimistic here. Edge: Mets

1B – Mark Teixeira vs. Ike Davis. This is a much more interesting match up than you might think. Tiexeira… Texeira… Teixiera… Teixeira still plays great defense, which counts for a lot, but he’s seven years older than Ike and coming off a pedestrian, for him, 24 hr, 84 rbi, .251 avg. year. Plus his name still trips up the little freaks at the annual Scripps Spelling Bee. Davis entered last season with something called Valley Fever whose side effects apparently include anemic hitting (.227 avg.) with occasional power bursts (32 hrs).  Tempted to call this one even but… Slight Edge: Yankees

2B – Robinson Cano vs. Daniel Murphy. Answer: “Robbie Cano, dontcha know.” Question: “Who had perhaps the worst playoffs of anyone on the Yankees?” And that’s saying a lot because the whole team kinda sucked in the post season. That being said, we just can’t take Murphy here, even though Keith Hernandez seems obsessed with him. Edge: Yankees

3B – Kevin Youkilis vs. David Wright. Youk may thrive as a Yankee, but Wright really seemed to turn a corner last year, especially on defense. Sure we’d like to see better power numbers but those don’t come easy with a lineup like this. Youks Ike-like 2012 .235 average doesn’t help him either. Edge: Mets

SS - Derek Jeter vs. Ruben Tejada. No breakdown necessary, broken ankle and all, this one belongs to Jeter until he starts acting his age, which doesn’t seem anytime soon. If Tejada does manage to outplay Jeter this year he will become New York’s most famous Ruben since Ben Stiller’s Reuben Feffer in Along Came Polly. Edge: Yankees

OF – Ichiro, Granderson, Gardner vs. Baxter, Nieuwenhuis, Duda. Wow, this one’s not even close. Even taking into account Ichiro’s age, Gardner’s past injuries, and the remorseless strikeout machine that is the Grandyman, at least the Yankees are fielding a professional outfield featuring better than average defense, speed, and even some power. I’m not sure anyone in the Mets projected starting outfield could have started for the 1962 team. Edge: Yankees

Starting Rotation - Sabathia, Kuroda, Pettitte, Hughes, Nova vs. Santana, Niese, Marcum, Harvey, Gee. This one would have been a hell of a lot closer had the Mets held on to Robert Allen Dickey, but he, his 20 wins, and Cy Young have headed north. That being said, fans should be excited to see a full season of Matt Harvey and the signing of righty Shaun Marcum looks like a good one. Johan Santana is a total question mark though and the Mets don’t have anyone to match Sabathia. Edge: Yankees

Déjà vu all over again... again.

Déjà vu all over again… again.

Relievers – Rivera, Robertson, Chamberlain, etc. vs. Francisco, Parnell, etc. I would take a one-legged, 60-year-old Mariano over Frank Francisco any day. Joba Chamberlain will probably come down with the bubonic plague but it matters not. The Mets have brought in Pedro Feliciano and Latroy Hawkins to bolster the pen, which is kinda funny. Edge: Yankees

Hmm… this started as a fun exercise but got kinda of depressing as we moved down the list. Still shaking my head about the Mets outfield. Who knows, maybe Collin Cowgill turns out to be a cult success.

Come back to tomorrow for MTM cult fave Cam James… or will it be luscious Lori Levine??? Stay tuned.

 

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About the Author ()

Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, "Don't have a enough short, white angry guys but I don't dislike them... that much." A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.
  • http://twitter.com/Cookies_Corner Cookies Corner

    I applaud your honesty, O’Angry One. Mets have a lot of Duda in their outfield.
    That said, nothing is necessarily solid on the Yankees… but damn… the sticks can’t get any WORSE than they were for them in the post last year.

    • Yankee Joe

      Cookie babyI missed you! Two things we all all no – the Mutts SUCK and the Yankees will be in the playoffs!!

      • http://meetthematts.com/ Meet The Matts

        We’ll see about that, YJ! Will the utes be served or Old Man Crankee defy Father Time again?!

      • http://twitter.com/Cookies_Corner Cookies Corner

        Yankee Joe! Good to hear from you! You’re right.. but i must admit that while playoffs yes… beyond.. i’m not so sure about this year either. Ugh. But farther than the Mets… absolutely!

  • Cam James

    Duda…. More Like KAKA! (kaka means poop).

    • http://meetthematts.com/ Meet The Matts

      Did you mean Kafka? We loved The Hunger Artist.

      • http://twitter.com/Cookies_Corner Cookies Corner

        I loved Metaporphosis myself. I actually saw it on Broadway a billion years ago with Mikael Baryshnikov. He’s one sixty year old I’d bang.

        • http://twitter.com/Lori_Levine LoriLevine

          Gregor! Never saw the ballet. That boy had some demons… See you all tomorrow.

      • http://twitter.com/CheesyBruin Cheesy Bruin

        The Castle, a very underrated and under appreciated work of Kafka.

  • MartyStein9er

    Harvey can be a Seaver if he stays healthy. Niese could be Koosman. There is hope and Ike Davis is my idol!

    • http://meetthematts.com/ Meet The Matts

      Marty, we like your chutzpah! Matt Harvey Wallbanger Night will be every night he takes the hill for us! And as for the Chosen One… We Like Ike! (Except on first and second pitch curveballs in and in the dirt).

    • oblique outlook

      He’ll get elbow tendinitis in August and be shut down.

    • AngryWard

      I’ll say this about Marty’s Seaver/Koosman comment: it shows that you are hanging your hopes on someone other than Johan, which is healthy. Whatever Santana can give the Mets this year should be looked at as gravy, rather than something counted upon.

  • http://ThePublicProfessor.com The Public Professor

    You forgot to compare the DH position.
    Oh. Nevermind.

    • http://meetthematts.com/ Meet The Matts

      That’s where a Pedro Feliciano comes in. He has to hit for both teams in the Subway Series…

    • AngryWard

      You’re right! An Oversight. Here goes… DH – Travis Hafner vs. Rusty Staub. Edge: Mets.

    • http://twitter.com/Lori_Levine LoriLevine

      Is the DH position like reverse cowgirl?

  • http://twitter.com/CheesyBruin Cheesy Bruin

    Good grief, Charlie Brown! Latroy Hawkins is still pitching????

    • http://twitter.com/Different_Matt Different Matt

      Yeah I though Hawkins was dead

      • AngryWard

        The font size on the back of his baseball card can only be read with an electron microscope. Y’know same as Willie Horton’s when he was finishing up his career in Seattle.

  • Randy Levine

    A Rueben is my sandwich

  • http://twitter.com/Different_Matt Different Matt

    I think it’s going to be a long season for New York baseball fans with the Yankees not living up to the lofty expectations of the fans and the Mets meeting the dour expectations of their fans. there will be plenty of good seats available at both ballparks this season.

  • WestCoastCraig

    Cervelli and D’Arnaud were hilarious on Hogan’s Heroes.

    • Sam’s-A-Fan

      The best two catchers since Manfredi and Johnson went over the wall.

      • jgclancy

        Manfredi & Johnson had better odds than the Mets though

  • Dude

    let’s see… neither team will be good this year… the mets will fade after the all star break and the yankees in august. at least we’ll be able to get $3 tickets on stub hub to drink beer and eat shack burgers until about the 6th inning when we’ll be good and loaded to yell at duda… ah summertime!

    • AngryWard

      Thank you for making it all seem so palatable. See you there, Dude.

  • jgclancy

    As I hop a plane to San Diego tomorrow to search out a week of eating burritos,tacos,flautas,refried beans,guacamole, hot carrots, tostadas, churros,oh you get the picture..I will not give beisball a thought.The only question that really matters to me (and apparently only me according to Tall Matt) every year is whether the Oakland A’s will have more wins than the Mets! I guarantee it after seeing the Mets on tv with those ballcaps that have Mr. Met on the front!
    Go Aztecs!

  • Grote2Dmax

    Duda and Ike have to provide some power and Murphy and Tejada have to stay healthy and it could be a fun summer. Let’s Go Mets. That being said the Yanks will probably win as many as the Mets lose, I just hope it’s not 95 games.

  • Sam’s-A-Fan

    Frogging Knicks!

  • vinny from brooklyn

    i think the mets will come close to .500 this year.

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