SAG HARBOR, NY: I’m out here in tony Keith Hernandez Territory, fighting through this column and my last triathlon of the season. Racing the Mighty Hamptons (Olympic distance tri), yours truly did quite well. I placed 2nd in my age group and posted the 2nd fastest bike split (a 1:08 for a near 25-mile course). Lemme tell you, its quite a THRILL to come off the bike and hear “Your number two woman is off the bike course.” Yup. I was riding thick amongst dudes, getting MAD kudos and ‘”chicking” many of them. It was good stuff. Sure, my run still needs work but ya Cook held on for some hardware.
But enough about me… you wanna talk sports that people bet on.
It’s September. Football has started… Baseball is winding down… maybe Grote2DMax or West Coast Craig are playing golf still… The NBA will be back soon… As a Yankees fan, I’m always looking for the post-season to roll around. Right now I’m hanging onto a decent hope with the Bombers just ONE game back in the Wild Card. Anything can happen in the week before I’ve got tickets to what MAY or MAY NOT be, a meaningful or meaningless game.
So, let’s review my 10 Reasons Why The Yankees Make The Playoffs:
10) Susan Waldman and Michael Kay. Um.. OK. Maybe not. No one needs to hear them any more. No one needs to hear the TBS announcers. No one needs to hear Joe ‘What-the-F*UCK?!?’ Buck’ on a Fox forecast. But it’s still more baseball than the Mets are gonna get.. so.. there’s that.
9) Football is nice... but can the Denver Broncos win TWICE – in a row? I dunno. But yeah. The Broncs won last week. Suck it Joe Flacco (who we STUFFED) and all you neigh sayers of Peyton Manning. He’s not too old.
8) Night games. I like night games. There’s a reason RIGHT THERE to get drunk. (Angry Ward back me up here. and yes… my path to the Betty Ford Clinic is coming along NICELY.
7) A-Rod: I’m a Yankees fan. I want the Yankees to win. But really, post season for him with no Kate Hudson va-jay-jay means he’s gonna whiff. As if I needed MORE of a reason to HATE him. Mrs. Matt… you feel me?
6) Yankee Joe’s posts after a Yankee win.
5) Angry Ward’s posts after a Yankee loss.
4) TONS of coverage of EVERY game being Mo’s possible last game.
3) TONS of coverage of EVERY game being Jeter’s possible last. Um, wait a minute.
2) At least it’s not thugball.. I mean.. NBA Basketball.
1) MORE ALFONSO SORIANO.
And with that… I’m outta here. Come on back tomorrow for the Wild [Card] antics of Fake Sandy Alderson… maybe?!!?
GO YANKS! Oh, and Junoir Blaber, manana.
Filed in: Cookie's Corner