Author Archive for Angry Ward

Wednesday: Angry Ward, who has admirers at the NY Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way conservatives embrace Mitt Romney. While the Vikings tease him incessantly with flirtations of success, the Golden State Warriors, "Don't have a enough short, white angry guys but I don't dislike them... that much." A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, The Franchise.

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Giants, Bosox, Dodgers, Tyreek and other Fall Fodder

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BRONX, NY – Autumn has officially arrived here in the Northeast, and it’s spectacular. As I say to others who reside in and around New York, “THIS, is why we live here.” With cooler temps and the corresponding explosion of leaf color come light jackets, brown liquor sipping, and just spending as much time outdoors as […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Your Halloween Sports Costume Guide

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BRONX, NY – Welcome to the scariest time of year. For Mets fans it’s the months between June and September, for everyone else, it’s Halloween. Anyway, if you’re stuck for costume ideas, there’s plenty of low-hanging fruit in the world of sports. Here are some quick getup ideas, some of which have multiple applications, in Your […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Lie, Cheat, Steal and Win – America Has Lost its Way. A-Rod, Lance, Mets, Pats

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BRONX, NY – I went to David Wright’s final Mets game last Saturday night with Short & Tall Matt, but I just don’t have the heart or energy to write about what a disappointment it was. It felt a lot closer to the Mets money-grab I thought it was going to be than the legitimate farewell […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Tiger, Knicks, Gritty… I Want to Bet on Everything

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BRONX, NY – I’ve said this on more than one occasion, but I will never be as much of a diehard sports fan as I was when I was a teenager. With age comes perspective and change, at least if you’re open to those concepts. So you start realizing that there are a lot of things […]

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Angry Ward: Eli Manning, Vontae Davis, and Other NFL Checkdowns

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BRONX, NY – We’re now two full weeks into the NFL season and already there’s plenty to talk about. And, shockingly, none of it has to do with kneeling during the National Anthem. Bummer. Nevertheless, let’s get rid of this column quick, like a New York Giants offensive possession, so we can punt it away to […]

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DJ Eberle Quits MTM at Halftime?

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BUFFALO, NY – So, I guess DJ doesn’t live here anymore? What happened? No explanation, no nothing. How very Vontae Davis of him. And here I was looking forward to all kinds of Hawt Bills takes all year. Things like, “Shady McCoy for NFL Man of the Year” and “The Bills Could Still Win the […]

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Sweaty Ward Saturday: Soccer Practice, Pool, and Weekend Sports

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BRONX, NY – I just finished helping out  at my daughter’s soccer practice and let me just say that 1) I am tired and 2) I still very much suck at soccer. But, as a parent, you do what you have to do. Anyway, to “reward” myself for my selflessness, I am writing a Saturday […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Mama Matt, Burt Reynolds and When Eras End

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BRONX, NY – Please excuse the “personal” aspect of today’s column. I just thought it was appropriate. I found out through our own Tall Matt, that Peggy McCarthy, Mom to our own Short Matt and to this site by association, passed away this past Thursday. Though I only met her just a short time ago at […]

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MC Oberle’s Cold NFL Leftovers

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MIDDLE-OF-NOWHERE, USA— Looks like my good-for-nothing cousin, DJ, has gone missing again. What are you gonna do? He’s probably crying into his overstuffed Buffalo Bills Bruce Smith snuggle pillow. And yesterday’s “game,” if you want to call it that, is probably a good place to start with this Week 1 NFL recrap. That’s right, I said […]

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Angry Ward Friday: Breaking – Steve Sarkisian Sucks!

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BRONX, NY – I was one of those morons that waited out the lightning delay last night and watched Buddy Diaz’s Philadelphia Eagles win a game that they definitely should have lost. Well, I wasn’t that stupid, actually. I checked out after the 3rd quarter when it became crystal clear that the Atlanta Falcons, a supremely […]

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