Author Archive for The Public Professor

Mattville's George Plimpton, The Public Professor, is indeed a real, honest-to-goodness, legitimate professor at a major Maryland university. But because he doesn't have a cell phone or cable, he's crazy enough to be with us. A member of Angry Ward's Urban Spur Posse, the terrorized Bronx graffiti artist's by correcting their grammar. His loves? The Yankees, Knicks, NY Rangers and the Pittsburgh Steelers. He also has a real website: ThePublicProfessor.com (http://www.thepublicprofessor.com/).

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The Super Bowl, and Goodnight

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The Exit- I’ve been appearing weekly at this fair site for more than two years now.  But all good things and mediocre people must come to an end, and my time is nigh. As the countdown to my exit began, at first it seemed that a Super Bowl recap would be the perfect note on […]

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Why You Should Root for the Baltimore Ravens in the Super Bowl

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Halfway to N’Awlins- Look.  I’m a Steelers fan.  So this isn’t easy for me.  Granted, it’s not as bad as 1986 when I had to choose between the Red Sox and the Mets. That’s like trying to choose between John Wayne Gacy and Jerry Sandusky. For the record, I decided to root for the Red […]

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Baltimore Tumbles into the Bay: Ravens Win For Art & Earl

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BALTIMORE, MD -  Only three more columns from Baltimore.  I’m retiring from Mattsville after the Super Bowl, and none to soon.  Charm City is crumbling fast, and I need to devote my energies to gathering supplies and strengthening the bunker. The zombie apocalypse begins here, bitches. The first omen came on Saturday morning when I […]

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NFL Playoffs Recap & Things To Do While Not Watching !@#$ Lance Armstrong

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“… shame on that hoary billionaire Winfrey for foisting this piece of human excrement on us.” LE FRENCH ALPS – We’ll get to this weekend’s scintillating NFL playoff action, believe you me.  But first I’d like to begin with a list of things I’d rather do than watch Lance Armstrong on the Ophrah Winfrey Show […]

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Baltimore on the Loose (Lewis)

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Baltimore-  Thanks to 6:00 A.M Morning Matt for buying me some time.  I’m just “crawling from the wreckage” now, as Dave Edmuds once described it.  The carnage of what was once Baltimore is now naught but charred ruins and empty Courvoisier bottles. Ray Lewis stunned his loyal fan base on Friday by announcing he was […]

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The NFL Is Meaningless

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Staring Into The Void – Recent tragedies of this past autumn, including super storm Sandy and the Newtown school massacre, rightly readjust our priorities and remind us that sporting entertainment like the NFL is, at the end of the day, essentially meaningless. But inevitably, most of us will eventually put those horrid events behind us, […]

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