Tag: Angry Ward

Angry Ward Wednesday: Bill Murray vs. Tom Hanks – A Sports Showdown

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BRONX, NY – This is my second post this week! Wow! I feel so important, and so very, very alone. As I mentioned last week, summer sports is really just boiling down to baseball. You can focus on the Thursday night’s NBA draft if you like, but it’s most likely that your team–especially you, Knicks […]

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Bengasm Tuesday: Rihanna Disses Durant, the Odell Beckham Contract Situation, and Tanaka Giving Up Long Dongs

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BROAD CHANNEL, NY – It’s Tuesday, buckle in for your weekly Bengasm. This week I’ll take a look at Rhianna’s whiff on a diss of Kevin Durant. I’m also starting to get nervous about Odell’s contract situation and Tanaka Serving Up a Ton of Long Dongs. Let’s get to it. Durant Diss In case you […]

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Angry Ward Monday: Eb’s Very Hot “Hawt Takes,” Bombers Bombed by Oakland, John Daly Back?

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BRONX, NY – It’s friggin’ hot here in the Northeast. So where’s DJ Eberle and his Hawt Takes, now that we need him? Is he scrambling for a “think piece” on what LeBron will do in 2018? Is he fighting the restraining order Chance the Rapper has taken out on him? Or maybe he’s just off […]

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Warriors Snub Trump? MVP Awards, Markelle Flutz and Mayweather-McGregor Hoax

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EL BARRIO, EL BRONX – I have spent the day fighting off rumors and accusations that I have retired. Apparently, I have been doing so much pinch-hitting that I haven’t written enough for our sister site, Rugby Wrap Up. Anyway, I am not gonna let all that rumor and innuendo get me down as I […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Basketball’s Over. It’s Time for Baseball!

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BRONX, NY – The Golden State Warriors won the NBA Championship Monday night. I’m not gonna write about it, but it needed to be said. During the series, Tall Matt was on social media railing against this “superteam” that was ruining professional basketball. In his previous Shirley MacLaine lives, he also bashed John Wooden, the 1927 […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Yanks Attendance Tanks, NFL, NBA, NHL On Ropes; Great Fan Revolt is Upon Us

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BRONX, NY – These days, stupid phrases like “They are coming for your guns!” and “They are taking all of your jobs!” are not only taken as gospel, they get you elected President. But we’re not here to drop petulant hashtags like #fakenews or #sad, or make anything great again. Today, let’s just talk some common […]

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Meet The Matts And Sports Haiku

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MARLBORO, NY– We are an eclectic bunch here at Meet The Matts, with unique styles and viewpoints on all things sports. Today, in a somewhat negative vibe and as Junoir Blaber pontificated yesterday, I give you some Japanese poetry called Haiku as it relates to relevant sports items and some of the colorful folks on […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: The Rangers In Danger, Matt Harvey Mess, Possible NBA Fix

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BRONX, NY – Running short on time today. Got zero in the tank and one 12 oz bottle’s worth of liquid comedy to get me through this. Even though I’m not (ever) getting paid for this, and I’d rather beg off on this week’s post, I feel compelled to show up and do what’s expected of […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: The Met Gala vs. The Mets’ Gala, Rangers, Yanks and NBA

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NEW YORK, NY – The other night here in New York the Metropolitan Museum of Art hosted its annual “Met Gala” for all manner of glitterati and starf**kers who like to dress up like imbeciles and have their pictures taken by a rabid bunch of camera-wielding monkeys. It’s quite the scene. I was shocked when […]

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A Renaissance Unlike Any Other: Crazy Cardinals Fan Snaps, Weed at Rockies Games, Vonn Nude

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“In this defunct microcosm, eerily similar to the DPRK, the Broncos are the army and John Elway is the peoples’ Dear Leader.” –Cam James MILE HIGH CLUB, CO – When I was just a young boy, I had a baseball coach who liked to use metaphors to explain life lessons.  Generally these lessons were often […]

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