Tag: cespedes

FU to Hitler, Aaron Judge, Baby Bombers Boner, Hope Solo Gets Arnold Burn

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WHITE PLAINS, NY  – A quick turnaround, but the people want more B-Dubs. What can I do but give the people what they want? I’ll be here every Tuesday going forward, so get involved. Here’s another installment of Cheers Bro, Aw Hell No & Man I Don’t Know. CHEERS BRO Olympic Athletes – The improvement […]

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Deep Thoughts with Fake Sandy Alderson: MLB, Mets

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PANIC CITY, BLOCK C – A couple of years ago, my 4-year-old niece found herself in a bit of hot water. Seems she had drawn all over her brother’s homework. When “called on the carpet” to face these charges, she stalled and grinned for a good 5 minutes before finally blurting out, “I want cake!” […]

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Yo! Make your Move, Mets!

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Greenwich, CT—“Mets Twitter” is on the verge of a Chernobyl-like meltdown. I say Chernobyl because the Mets’ stunning inaction in the face of several Yoenis Cespedes rumors promises to ruin Met fan allegiance for decades. The hated Washington Nationals have reportedly made a 5 year offer for more than $100M to Cespedes. Such a Cuban […]

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Blaber’s Bold Moves for Mets to get back to Series in ’16!

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EL BARRIO, LA BRONX – Well that was an incredible run. The Metsies gave me loads of hope. We came close despite the 4-1 series loss to the (now) hated Royals.  So let’s start talking about what to do with the team as we look forward to next season. Here then, is one man’s opinion […]

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How the Mets got their Groove Back and the Keys to Victory vs. LA

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Wheeling, WV—While I whistle past the graveyard and await the Mets’ return trip from LA next week, I’m compelled to try figuring out how these lovable Mutts got here. April-The Mets went on an 11 game winning streak. In many ways, this unexpected streak would set the tone for what was to come. With Miami, […]

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Are You Ready for Some Football? Matt Harvey vs Fans, Giants-Cowboys

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NFL League Headquarters, New York, NY—Tonight is the kickoff of another NFL season! The anticipation is gnawing at the brains of millions of Fantasy Footballers . How appropriate is it that Tom Brady and his deflated balls are featured tonight against Big Ben Roethlisberger and the Steelers? How unusual is it that drones have been spotted hovering over Steelers practice for the past […]

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Mets’ Alderson Succumbed to Pressure-NL East Title in their Sights

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Centennial, CO—I don’t know about everyone else, but I’ve been both enjoying “the ride” and running out of things to bitch about. Let’s face it, and this was Short Matt‘s fear all along. I’m a “One-Trick Pony”  How long can one crazed yet passionate Met fan rail against his team’s ownership and its General Manager […]

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Senoir, New York Mets and New York Jets

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EL BARRIO, LA BRONX -Today’s piece is dedicated to Senoir. The greatest man I ever knew took his final breath this past Wednesday. So why am I talking about this, let alone writing today’s piece? Well that is because this is what he taught me. Senoir was big on staying busy, doing your job and […]

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