Tag: Chase Utley

Angry Ward Wednesday: Yanks Reject Bryce Harper, World Cup Porto Party, and Utley Amazin’ Thor Video

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BRONX, NY – Look, it’s late. I think I’m losing what’s left of my mind. Against a lifetime of better judgement, I decided to take my kid to see the philharmonic in the park tonight. Who am I??? Just got home a shade before 11. Not good for her, but worse for me. I’m just gonna […]

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Chinese New Year Edition: Biggest Roosters in Sports [Ahem]

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MARLBORO, NY– Yesterday marked the Chinese New Year and ushered in the Year of the Rooster. With a little assistance from the old dictionary is the word rooster: roost-er (NOUN), a male domestic fowl; a cock. With that is the brainchild of today’s column as we address some of the biggest roosters (ahem!) in sport […]

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5 People Mets Fans Should Fear. @AldersonFake Reports

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AIKEN, SC – The Meet The Matts staff is always concerned about preparing Mets fans for an upcoming season. With much changing since the Amazins lost to the Kansas City Royals in Game 5 of the 2016 World Series back on November 1st, I felt is was my duty to keep you on the ready. […]

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Ebs’ Hot Takes: MLB Playoffs

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Saratoga Springs, NY – We’re less than a week into the MLB postseason and there has already been a lot of buzz around this year’s edition. From both of the lower seeds winning the wild card games to Chase Utley breaking Ruben Tejada’s leg in a controversial slide Saturday night, there’s a lot to talk about. […]

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Trading Deadline: Here’s What To Trade

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HOLLYWOOD, CA – Baseball’s Trading Deadline is tomorrow night, and a number of big moves have already happened in the last week. Ichiro to the Yanks; Hanley Ramirez and Kevin Youklis are already paying dividends in their new settings; the Angels making Zack Greinke their number three starter; the surprise Pirates proving to be buyers with […]

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WORLD BLEEPIN' CHAMPIONS

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“If I told you once, I told you 27 times… WORLD BLEEPIN’ CHAMPIONS!” by Yankee Joe (Yankee Fan) BRONX, NY – From Day 1 this year, I said things would be restored to their natural order, that the Yankees would take back what they LET other teams have since crushing the Mutts in 2009. Now, […]

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ANGRY WARD WEDNESDAY: SIX EDUCATION

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BRONX, NY – Here we are on November frogging 4th and we’re still talking about baseball. Game 6 between the Yanks and Phils tonight at the Whore Emporium. Just the way the suddenly lucid George Steinbrenner planned it. In fact, rumor has it that Big Stein himself is going to hang-glide into the Stadium prior […]

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MISERY LOVES COMPANY: AMAZIN' MUTT FANS BACK PHAILIN' PHILS

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by Different Matt BRONX, NY – I have returned from hibernation to find my beloved Yankees one win away in the World Series. The Bombers will again host the Phillies of Philly in a Game Six of the 2009 fall classic (after the Frillies held on phor dear life in Game 5) And while most […]

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CIVIL WAR IN NYC: ONE MAN'S TORMENT

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by Yankees Suck… As [edited] by the MTM Censors NEW YORK, NY – What is best in life? Conan the Barbarian summed it up perfectly: “To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their women.” But what happens when your two biggest enemies are fighting each other and you’re […]

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COOKIE'S CORNER: AMERICAN [LEAGUE] GIGOLO

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YANKEE STADIUM, DA BRONX – The heat is on here at MeetTheMatts.com these days with some serious anti-Yankee sentiment. (Damn you Mets for not signing Cliff Lee. If Cliff Lee was a Met, Yanks might be up 2-0). The title of this post might make you think ‘Oh no!! What has our Cookie done now?!?’ […]

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