Tag: Cleveland Browns
Grinding Ax: NFL Free Agency Frenzy, March Madness Mayhem
White House, NJ – NFL Free Agency is kicking off , therefore, we get to witness intelligent owners, GM’s and coaches acting amorously towards a group of players who are ready to break ties with the teams and fans who supported them. It’s truly Reality TV playing out before us. Some will hit the proverbial lotto, inking deals that […]
Big Ben Tuesday: How to Fix the Cleveland Browns, Whitney on Whitney
KICKAPOO, KS – I was thinking of exploring the rumor that Vladimir Putin hacked into St. Louis Blues’ GM Doug Armstrong’s email to trade Kevin Shattenkirk to the Capitals . Vlad is dying to see Russian winger Alex Ovechkin win a Cup. #Sad. But I need a challenge, so I decided to single-highhandedly fix the Cleveland Browns. […]
Myles Garrett, Mike Illitch, St Louis University Hoops Bus Driver and Phil Collins?!
EL BRONX, EL BARRIO – What time is it?! Showtime! What time is it?! Showtime! Those are the most annoying 8 words to hear when you are on a NYC train. However, this time out it is “Showtime!” for yours truly, Pinch-hit Matt. Anyway, in keeping with my new routine/gig, you get a Song of […]
Angry Ward Wednesday: What Board Game is Your Favorite Sports Team?
BRONX, NY – Hey there, sports dopes, shiftless employees, and assorted other loners. It’s another wonderful Wednesday here at MeetTheMatts.com. NFL playoffs, Trump inauguration, the Knicks still sucking… so much to talk about. But, to hell with that noise, I want to write about old-timey board games – y’know, the one’s you used to play with […]
NFL Recap: Giants Unimpressive Win, Fitzy over Frankenstein, Crazy Keanu Finish in Baltimore
STAMFORD, CT -I know the Knicks are threatening relevancy for the first time in a while and I know the Rangers are playing fast but not too loose – Sunday’s game notwithstanding – and are looking like a contender. But I’m in Giants/NFL mode, so let’s do it. Giants: An unimpressive win, letting the Browns hang around too […]
Are the NY Giants Contenders? Josh McCown, Cowboys, Eli and Oedipus?
STAMFORD, CT – Another NFL week is in the books, with the New York Giants on a five game winning streak and threatening to make the playoffs. The wheat is separating from the chaff, whatever that means, and the Giants are right there at 7-3. The Giants keep winning ugly, but it sure beats losing pretty. O-Line […]
Whitney Breakdown: Big Win for the Giants, Eagles Fans to Blame For Trump, Jets to Dangerfield?
WHITE PLAINS, NY – I’m guessing the NFL ratings will be up now that we actually had a few good national games – Cowboys vs Steelers, Seahawks vs Patriots and the Jets vs Rams. Just kidding about that last one, of course, but I’m surprised the NFL didn’t save that snoozer for prime time. Man, […]
Angry Ax Wednesday? Dak Prescott, Billy Goat, Dawg Pound, NY Rangers Rolling
FREEHOLD, NJ – While Angry Ward enjoys some R&R, management reached out to me to bring some civility back to this forum. The word is that ratings here are tanking at the same rate as the NFL’s! That’s just horrible! I trust that they sent out an email blast to let readers know that The Grinding Ax would be swinging an Angry One […]
5 NFL Related Business Ideas: Consoling, Gun Storage, Social Media Management, Penalty Prevention, Anger Redirection
ALBERTA, CANADA – It’s Tuesday, time for your Weekly Dose of Whitney! Last week I discussed some of the reasons for the NFL’s declining ratings, this week I’m thinking about making money off them. That’s right, we’re going to make money off the NFL! This one is for you entrepreneurs out there: – 5 Opportunities for NFL-Related […]
Big Ben Tuesday: NFL QB Staring Contests; Brock Osweiler, Tony Romo and Jimmy Garoppolo
CHUNKY, MISSISSIPPI – I’ve got my head turned toward the NFL again, and the QB Chinese fire drill is riveting. The landscape for quarterbacks is pretty barren – only old and fragile veterans remain available, while the draft class is filled with not-ready-for-prime-time projects. Anybody with an arm and a few snaps under his belt is getting […]
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