Tag: Lionel Messi

How To Fix Soccer So It Doesn’t Suck. Steal From Rugby.

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PARIS, FRANCE – For those of you tuning in to see another brilliant Angry Ward expose on douchebaggery of the umpteenth degree, you’ll be stunned to know that he’s been sent by MTM Management to cover the Women’s Soccer World Cup. Now that we have the attention of the the three remaining Americans still reading […]

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Rangers Do Well in Draft as World Cup Heats Up

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NEW YORK, NY – The Rangers went into this years draft looking to restock the coffers with young talent to shorten the rebuild that started this past January. With the 9th pick in the draft the Blueshirts took forward Vitali Kravtsov. The 18-year old Russian winger is close to a sure thing to make an […]

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MLB Rumors, Copa America Centenario and Euro 2016

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EL BRONX, EL BARRIO – Summertime is killer on the American sports scene. There are two things to talk about: Baseball or Sports No One Cares About. In order to keep our fans equally happy and disinterested, today’s piece will cover both. Today’s topics are: MLB Rumors, Copa America Centenario and Euro 2016. MLB News: First […]

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Baseball’s Freak of Nature, a Sepp Blatter and World’s Biggest Star

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Very rarely – probably never – do we write about just one athlete. We certainly don’t write about a player from a team that shunned the shores of the East River for the shores of San Francisco Bay. And we ain’t going to do it today. But we talk about Baseball’s […]

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Last Word on World Cup: Messi, Messier and German Schadenfreude

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“Argentina tried to be cute, Germany aimed for handsome.” –West Coast Craig CORCOVADO, BRAZIL – No, Messi Against the Mannschaft was not a feature playing at West Hollywood’s Tomkat Theater, it was the culmination of sixty-four soccer matches across the first month of summer that pretty much dominated the zeitgeist by sheer force of global […]

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