Tag: Los Angeles Lakers

Grinding Ax Friday: Big Balls, Ranger Falls, LaVar Ball, Romo vs Cutler

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NOTE: Different Matt was out past curfew Thursday night and “went golfing” yesterday. A “migraine” and miscommunication had him AWOL at MTM HQ, so Grinding Ax Walter Hynes took the ball on no rest, after flying in from Des Moines. FREEHOLD, NJ – Are you a serious baller? If you think you are or aspire to […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Bogut Breaks, Bambi Steaks, Tank Time for Jets and Lakes

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BRONX, NY – I was watching “All the President’s Men” on Sunday night, because I wanted to remind myself of a simpler time when jagoff, crooked politicians were held accountable by somewhat competent journalists and informants named after porn movies. Then, on Monday night, I watched the Tom Hanks ’80s classic, “The Money Pit.” You put those […]

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Kobe Bryant Benches Kobe Bryant, Yanks Undermine Mets, Derek Jeter

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN – A few things that happened this week deserve attention: the New York Yankees getting back to the business of out-doing the cross-town New York Mets at the Winter Meetings and Kobe Bryant benching Kobe Bryant. Admittedly, we didn’t like Kobe Bryant up until this week. And no, it wasn’t because he told […]

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Jets Time Travel, Buffalo Bills, Knicks v Lakers, New York City FC

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EL BARRIO, DE BRONX – Yours truly, Deacon Blaber, spends a healthy amount of time opining on the latest sports news. However, today I will attempt something different. Today, I will share with you the thoughts of my flock; the people I know and their thoughts on sports matters. Included in this group is the […]

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The Quest For D12: Who Gets Dwight Howard?

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OAKLAND, CA – And NBA Free Agency starts… NOW! This off-season’s biggest free agent target is former Los Angeles Lakers center Dwight Howard. After a season of disappointment in Hollywood, Dwight is finally testing the waters. The Big Man has already condensed his short list to the Atlanta Hawks, Dallas Mavericks, Golden State Warriors (Why? […]

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What’s Next for the Black Mamba?

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After carrying an underachieving Lakers squad on his back for the entire season, Kobe Bryant finally cracked. And it wasn’t his back either. Bryant ruptured his Achilles tendon in the final minutes of a two-point victory against the Golden State Warriors. The Black Mamba was driving to the hoop and was fouled by Harrison Barnes […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Five, Five, Five

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NEW YORK, NY – It’s all about five today people. I’m writing this thing as late as I ever have. Short Matt will probably be pulling out his hair–you know, ear hair, nose hair, shoulder blade hair–waiting on me. In fact, let’s just say by the time I submit this column it will actually be […]

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MY DADDY CAN BEAT UP YOUR DADDY

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by Rex O’Rourke TOBACCO ROAD, NC – So last night I’m watching Duke throttle North Carolina and I ask myself: “Self, what is the biggest rivalry in sports?” Is it Duke/UNC? They certainly rank up there. The Cameron Crazies alone are worth the price of admission. Multiple national championships on both sides and a dust […]

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