Tag: NY Giants

Grinding Ax Walter Hynes: Bye Bye Zeke Elliot and Kim Jong-un! Dennis Rodman Rescue?

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MANASQUAN, NJ –  While The New York Yankees do their best imitation of their neighbors from Queens, I believe it’s time to look forward, don’t you?  NFL football has managed, once again, to “trump” even the Real Trump, by suspending the leagues best running back, Ezekiel Elliott of the Dallas Cowboys.  Let’s face it, which news story is more compelling?  Kim Jong-un and his […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: Breaking Down Falcons’ Flop, Supermodel Celebration for the Ages

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Houston, TX: Clearly there is no justice in the world. What a depressing end to a riveting Super Bowl. Watching the Falcons do everything right until they did everything wrong was painful, and Hell’s favorite QB and Coach added another ring to their impressive resumés. The Falcons’ hammer missed the coffin’s last nail and the Pats clawed their […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: Super Bowl Prop Bets, Knicks Defense, NHL Rangers Outlook

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WHITE PLAINS, NY – I expected Trump to make America great again, but not this fast. I intentionally lost a game of Scrabble today, just because I’m so tired of winning already. Speaking of too much winning, if you’re like me, you’d rather eat a roadkill sandwich with vegenaise than watch the Pats win another […]

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NY Giants: Eli is a Dangerous Man, Odell’s Resolutions, Third Magical Run

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STAMFORD, CT: ESPN has the NY Giants as the second least likely NFC team to get to Houston, at 2.6% behind only the Lions. I don’t know how they got this number, but it seems that recent history is not heavily weighted. Come playoff time, Eli Manning is a dangerous man. But can this team run the […]

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Omar Little Sports Recap: GIgANTic Giants Win, Props to Jerry Reese, King Henrik Fights Off Usurper

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WHITE PLAINS, NY – On the Chinese Calendar, 2016 was The Year of the Turd. But thankfully, we do have the mighty G-Men (New York Giants) and Bluehirts (New York Rangers) to get us through to the end. So we’ve got that going for us, which is nice. Omar Little from The Wire helps me […]

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Grinding Ax: They Might Be Giants vs Cowboys

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EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ-  Eli Manning’s New York Giants are playing for a chance to sneak another Super Bowl ring on their mitts.  This season lends great opportunity for Gump & Company.  The league is void of an overwhelming powerhouse squad as evidenced by looking at the records across the divisions. Wait a minute! What about the Dallas Cowboys, who […]

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NFL Recap: Giants Unimpressive Win, Fitzy over Frankenstein, Crazy Keanu Finish in Baltimore

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STAMFORD, CT -I know the Knicks are threatening relevancy for the first time in a while and I know the Rangers are playing fast but not too loose – Sunday’s game notwithstanding – and are looking like a contender. But I’m in Giants/NFL mode, so let’s do it. Giants: An unimpressive win, letting the Browns hang around too […]

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Whitney Breakdown: Big Win for the Giants, Eagles Fans to Blame For Trump, Jets to Dangerfield?

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WHITE PLAINS, NY – I’m guessing the NFL ratings will be up now that we actually had a few good national games – Cowboys vs Steelers, Seahawks vs Patriots and the Jets vs Rams. Just kidding about that last one, of course, but I’m surprised the NFL didn’t save that snoozer for prime time. Man, […]

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Angry Ax Wednesday? Dak Prescott, Billy Goat, Dawg Pound, NY Rangers Rolling

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FREEHOLD, NJ – While Angry Ward enjoys some R&R, management reached out to me to bring some civility back to this forum. The word is that ratings here are tanking at the same rate as the NFL’s! That’s just horrible! I trust that they sent out an email blast to let readers know that The Grinding Ax would be swinging an Angry One […]

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NFL Ratings Nosedive: I Abused My Pregnant Wife, Extend My Contract!

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WHITE PLAINS, NY – It’s getting pretty hard to watch NFL football in good conscience these days. My list of grievances is growing. The NFL has treated its players poorly, including denying for years that the sport caused brain injuries. They have turned a blind eye or been slow to react to issues like domestic […]

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