Tag: Peyton Manning

Old Fart Cheesy Bruin: No Facebook Baseball, NFL Draft, Mets

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MARLBORO, NY – I was all set to make predictions for the opening round of the NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs but the bottom half of the standings in each conference are as muddled as my life, so those prognostications will have to wait. What I do know is the Boston Bruins are in, as are […]

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Tasteless NFL Pizza Wars, Peyton Manning, Papa John’s, Stan Fischler. Cheesy Bruin Slices The Cheese

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MARLBORO, NY – Maybe they took a taste test at the league office.  Maybe it was the company’s tasteless former CEO John Schnatter’s comments blaming NFL player protests for Papa John’s declining sales. Maybe they finally decided his pizza sucks so bad it was time toss his pies. Maybe it was all of the above. […]

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Words Schnatter! Kaepernick Cooks Papa Johns, Peyton, JJ Watt and Jerry Jones.

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LOUISVILLE, KY – Bad pizza enthusiasts, Jerry Jones, Peyton Manning and J.J. Watt are flying their sh!tty pizza boxes at half-mast, as Papa John Schnatter is stepping down as CEO from the Arby’s of Pies – Papa John’s. It seems bad acting in cheesy commercials with The Fun Manning for an Emperor’s New Clothes version […]

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Ebs’ Hot Takes: Super Bowl LI Reaction. Dewey Defeats Truman

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CLIFTON PARK, NY – Of course. Should we even be surprised? I’m certainly not… Once the New England Patriots cut the deficit to 16 points in the fourth quarter I knew the Atlanta Falcons were toast. I’ve seen it too many times before with the Buffalo Bills. Maybe after watching this fans outside of the […]

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NFL Stuff: Giants Sputter, Big 4, Possible Interlopers, Unwatchable Jets, Tom Brady Record

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WESTCHESTER, NY – It was a tough weekend for our heroes, the NY Giants. The defense did its part, with Olivier Vernon and Eli Apple playing particularly well, but the offense sputtered again. This offense has more starts and stops than a porn set. Er, I assume. While this year’s top draft pick is trending up, […]

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NFL Ratings Nosedive: I Abused My Pregnant Wife, Extend My Contract!

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WHITE PLAINS, NY – It’s getting pretty hard to watch NFL football in good conscience these days. My list of grievances is growing. The NFL has treated its players poorly, including denying for years that the sport caused brain injuries. They have turned a blind eye or been slow to react to issues like domestic […]

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Sports Mount Rushmore: Kobe Done, Peyton Gone, Big Papi to Follow

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“Please allow me to introduce myself. I’m a man of wealth and taste. I’ve been around for a long, long years…” PANIC CITY, NY – Who better to frame a year in which we’ve seen the retirements of several iconic players across Baseball, Football, and Basketball than the Rolling Stones? Some guys just know when […]

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NFL QB Carousel, Ryan Fitzpatrick And March Madness

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EL BARRIO, EL BRONX – Back in the good ole Bronx. Buffalo was nice but I do love – or should I say – enjoy the madness of this city? And nothing says “madness” quite like your New York Jets. NFL QB Carousel: The first thing I can’t shake is this NFL QB merry go […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Peyton Retires, Sharapova Dopes, Peeping Pays

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BRONX, NY – In a bad mood. Hurtin’. Hungry. Running low on grog. Good time to write. Let’s get to it. Peyton Manning Retires. Good riddance. Get on with hawking horrible pizza, waiting for sexual misconduct and doping allegations to subside, and micromanaging your son’s football career the way your Dad did. But, for the […]

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Lastest Stains on Sports: Tennis Cheats, McDonagh Concussions, Knicks Futility, Peyton

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COUSIN HUG, NJ – March Madness and St. Paddy’s Day are still almost a month away but that hasn’t stopped me from having the recurring dream of a jovial, bat-wielding leprechaun. Maybe it has something to do with Pitchers -n- Catchers reporting or Daniel Murphy leaving the Mets and their Irish fan base. Either way, […]

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