Tag: Prince Fielder

MLB S.O.B.s: Which Son of a Baseball Player Do You Want? Tatis, Guerrero, Kershaw?

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ALBANY, NY – When two members of your starting rotation go AWOL for questionable behavior, you can’t help but curse and murmur expletives like [frogging bunk tile] or a Son of a B!tch or two. But instead of naming Junoir Blaber or Cheesy Bruin as the rightful recipients of the aforementioned rough language on an […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Talkin’ Baseball with Harvey, Horrible Jeffrey Loria and Hard-to-Figure Hitters

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BRONX, NY – After two straight days of basking in the glow of D.J. Eberle’s Hot Takes (*cough* Cavs overrated. *cough*), I’m back to restore order and make everyone miserable again. As I tap this out on the keyboard, Matt Harvey is looking in the mirror, wondering what went wrong – again – after initially being […]

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Who Will Win Tonight’s Home Run Derby?

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Tonight is one of my favorite events in all of sports, the MLB Home Run Derby. This season’s derby brings a New York v. New York challenge with David Wright leading the NL squad and Robinson Cano the AL squad. Wright, who is playing the host of the event along with his Mets chose an […]

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Worst Week of Year Over: Baseball Back; Home Run Derby Done

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Boredom, USA – This is by far the worst sports week of the year. Thankfully, tonight we resume normal baseball service after the extended break. Baseball is back; the Home Run Derby is done. The week started with the [Insert Sponsor Here] Home Run Derby on Monday night, which is just boring and takes far […]

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The Prince has a new Kingdom and Giants on the Brink.

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New York, NY – The big baseball news this week is the Detroit Tigers landing all-star first baseman, Prince Fielder for $214 million over nine years. Fielder will try to hit homeruns out of the cavernous Comerica Park for the better part of the next decade as the Tigers first baseman. The only problem is […]

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Eat My Sports! Prince Fielder, Pujols, Romo Save Belly-Up Sports Bars

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WALL STREET – With football season in full swing, tailgating is in full swing. Really though, it’s something us fans do for all sports, wherever we can – like the local bar and grill. But a recent report shows that some of our favorite national chains are ready to go belly-up real soon and put […]

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Autumnal Geography: Tigers/Rangers, Brewers/Cards, Giants & Packers

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Everywhere and Nowhere- Let’s hammer out some autumnual geography, shall we? Detroit: Yes. I lived in Michigan from 1985-1992. Spent some of the best years of my life there. Lost my virginity there (I was upholding the cherished MtM tradition of not getting laid in HS). Smoked my first cigarette there. Watched Bucky Dent’s first […]

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THAT'S JUST PERFECT

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by West Coast Craig Mount Davis –– Dallas Braden became the latest in a long line of guys-you-wouldn’t-figure to throw a perfect game, and did. It’s a list with names like Don Larson, Len Barker, Tom Browning, and oh baby Kenny Rogers (though the list of guys you would figure to, and did, is well […]

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YOU ASKED FOR IT: THE MANNY GOES TO THE KENTUCKY DERBY

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by West Coast Craig TITLE CARD: THURSDAY, APRIL 22rd, 2010. CINCINATTI, OHIO. INT. GREAT AMERICAN BALLPARK. NIGHT. Manny pulls up lame running through first base, his calf sprained badly (yes, this is where and when he got hurt). He’s sent to the locker room early. Andrea Torre comes down to see how he’s doing…and notices […]

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DOIN' IT FOR THE KIDS

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by West Coast Craig There’s a hundred and sixty two games of regular season, And the World Series comes along just to end it, So the players have to keep on coming up with a reason, To pick a walk-up song and then defend it… …Like Nick Johnson who last week raised a few eyebrows—and […]

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