Tag: sports blog • sports comedy • sports commentary

Big Ben: Finding Silver Linings in the Coronavirus Lockdown – with John Lennon, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Alex Ovechkin

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WUHAN CLAN – Hey there. How are you guys handling the sheltering? Things are getting weird. But with this sudden addition of free time, we finally have time to get some sh!t done. You know, when we’re not “working from home.” It’s time to finish that screenplay, paint the deck, binge-watch The Wire and reconnect with […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: Wild Spins of the NFL QB Carousel are Coming- Brady, Rivers, Tua, Burrow

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Location Classified: As the deadly Cononavirus ravages our species, or as the whole world overreacts to a wimpy pseudo flu, depending on who you ask, we here at MTM must soldier on. With the draft about 45 days away, my eyes are turning to football. The NFL’s QB Carousel is about to be swinging like […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: The Virus and Noah’s Flood, the Rangers Likely Can’t Overcome Igor and Kreider Injuries

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Wuhan, China: I hope you all enjoy my last submission before I go to the bunker. Next week many of us will be dead. Except the kids. No kids are dying and hardly any are catching this virus. I’m not a religious man, but if there is some cosmic string puller up there, he probably […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: New York Rangers Delicate Transfer of Power from The King to The Czar

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BROADWAY, NYC – The end is near for Good King Henrik, as the NY Rangers are pulling the plug on the unsustainable three-goalie rotation. As Axl Rose once said about threesomes, “usually someone gets pissed off.” Well, here were are. The team is switching gears and turning full time to The Czar, Igor Shesterkin. With one […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: Did Shahanan Blow Another Super Bowl with Aggressive Play Calling Again?

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Miami, FL: Howard Marks, the famous investor, spoke in his recent letter about not judging the quality of a decision by the outcome. Crazy right? It’s all about results. Did you win or lose? Did you take her home or wind up with Harry Palmer? But Marks is not wrong. If you have trip aces […]

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Big Ben Whitney: Dissecting and Digesting a Delightful Divisional Round

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The Road to Miami: Well it’s Tuesday. And like the dairy farmer said to his delivery guy, I’d better churn something out. It was a hell of an entertaining weekend in the NFL and it’s time to break it down. Big Ben is here to help dissect and digest a delightful divisional round. Giants Tangent […]

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Big Ben’s Thanksgiving Guests: Pat Shurmur, Colin Kaepernick, Derek Jeter, John Sterling, Greg McKegg

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STAMFORD, CT – My wife decided at the last minute to take our nearly 3-year old twins to her parents’ house in Michigan. I am unable to go, sadly, but good luck on the plane, Honey. Like Daniel Jones after his umpteenth straight loss, I am undeterred and determined to have a killer Thanksgiving on […]

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Big Ben: Scary Post-Halloween Sports Figures; Dave Gettleman, Sam Darnold, Brian Cashman, AJ Hinch, Mark Staal, Hank Lundqvist

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STAMFORD, CT – This Halloween we took our daughters to a “Trunk or Treat” event instead of going door-to-door like the old days. For those unfamiliar, a bunch of cars park in a parking lot and adorn their trunks with Halloween decorations. The kids just go trick or treating from car to car. It was […]

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Big Ben Whitney: The Yankees Sweep, Poor Situational Hitting, Odell in Hell

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SWEEPSVILLE, NYC: The Browns vs Niners game was brutal, so I stuck with baseball. I thought you said these weren’t the same old Twins?  Seven runs in three games – I think they’re quite similar. The New York Yankees just  finished off the sweep. I’m going to start typing and see what happens. Let’s make […]

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Big Ben Tuesday: Aaron Boone Goes F**king Savage on Rookie Ump

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Roswell, New Mexico: We’re only about a month and a half away from “Raid Area 51” on September 20th and my bags are backed. But as the originator is now talking about turning it into a music festival, I don’t think he’s the right person to lead this raid. I’d like to suggest an alternative; […]

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