Rain Man Rants: Kwete Twins, T.O. Tees Off On Garrett And Hard Knocks

EL BARRIO, EL FALLS – It was another busy week for me. Luckily, I stumbled on my Song of the Week and two of my three topics really fast. Fast would be yesterday but the final topic took a bit of time because I had to decide whether to be timely and talk about the NBA Playoffs again! Or talk about something else and really there is not much to ad that we don’t know or DJ Eberle won’t cover on Monday. So I went with talking about the NFL. It is a ways away but, it is more exciting than saying Warriors-Rockets will go to 7 and as long as Cavs have LeBron, they got a chance but his help has to do something! Anyway, this week’s piece will feature the usual Song of the Week, followed by Kwete Twins, T.O. Tees Off On Garrett & Hard Knocks.

Song of the Week: I tend to like singer/songwriter types when it comes to music. One of my favorites is Matt Kearney. His second album’s song about his father’s life is so powerful, I have to listen to it alone because it wraps me up in feelings about how much I miss my Dad. Yet, I missed the release of his 4th album and didn’t hear about it until Spotify told me that he has fifth album out. So I went back and listened to his 4th album and I fell in love with the first track. He tells a bit of his story, then adds the slam poetry of a friend of his, acclaimed poet, Anis Mojgani. Mojgani’s “Shake the Dust” makes the song reach into your soul and find a comfy home. This week’s Song of the Week is Heartbreak Dreamer by Matt Kearney ft. Anis Mojgani. I actually like the rapper and the track, so I can throw this in the young kids faces next time they call me old.

Kwete Twins: As someone that at one point was an undocumented immigrant, stories of immigrants doing good things always warms my heart, especially if they are/were rugby guys. The Kwete twins, Eloi and Cosmos, are fraternal twins and refuges from the Democratic Republic of Congo, formerly Zaire (aka home of the Rumble in the Jungle). The boys family left Congo during a civil war and went to Zimbabwe. The boys grew up playing rugby in Zimbabwe and would have made the Zimbabwe Under 17 team except as refugees, they had paperwork issues. Then in 2016, the family was accepted into the USA and they moved to Phoenix. In the two years since the move, they have put on football pads, helmets and  gotten into three-point stances. And just like that, they are now star recruits. They speak seven languages: English, French, Swahili and four other African languages, which is impressive. In the classroom, Eloi has a 3.1 GPA and wants to become a radiologist. Cosmos carries a 3.5 GPA and would like to become a pilot. They have scholarship offers from D1 schools, so it is big success story. Also if they don’t go pro, they can always come back to rugby.

Eloi Kwete (#55) and Cosmos Kwete (#58)

T.O. Tees Off On Garret: Now, I know that every time Terrell Owens opens his mouth, we all sigh. What is this fool gonna say now?! He and Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson are a bit like football Kanyes, as in great players… but lawd don’t spend too much time on what they say. However, this time T.O. gets it right. Owens called out the Cowboys for using the players as scapegoats for the poor performance of the team. He believes the problem is Jason Garrett but the organization allows the team to be mediocre because they like Garrett. He pointed out that if you look at the case of Dwayne Casey in the NBA, he has done very good things with the Raptorsfinished first in the division before and won coaching awards – but the team seems stuck in being able to overcome the Cavaliers so Casey had to go. Meanwhile under Garrett, they have two playoff appearances in seven plus season and Garrett is still there while other coaches have been let go in the NFL for doing better.

Cleveland Browns and Hard Knocks:  So, not just content with taking the wrong #1 pick and likely the wrong quarterback in the draft, the Cleveland Brown are now featuring on HBO’s pre-season camp doc, “Hard Knocks.” Why?! We know you guys suck. Back to back 0-16 seasons says you should be relegated to College Football FBS status. But now you want to bring you patheticness (Blaberism) to the limelight. Well good luck, because a lot of people don’t know why you passed on the best RB in the draft to grab a barely 6 ft. QB from the Red River area to play and try to throw the ball in the Lake Erie area, let alone pass on the best defensive end available. You know what? Go ahead. Give us an in-depth look at your sucking because there is always a market for snuff films, despite what people tell you. And this will be a snuff series.

Leave your thoughts below and come back tomorrow for another gem by Cheesy Bruin. You can also find us on Twitter – @JunoirBlaber, @MeetTheMatts & @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram – @MeetTheMatts – and Facebook Meet The Matts.

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About Junoir Blaber 519 Articles
Junoir Blaber is from Ghana but was transplanted to the Bronx as a young lion chaser. Blaber is the Rain Man of Meet The Matts and is a featured contributor on MTM global partner, Rugby Wrap Up. The name "Junoir" is not a cool African name. Instead, Blaber mis-typed "Junoir" on his Facebook page. But proving that two wrongs indeed do make a right, he embraced his new persona - [June-noire]... Manute Bol is his uncle and his teams are the Mets, Jets, Knicks & NY Rangers... And Manchester United. He knows soccer. [Vomit]. P.s... He has webbed toes and came be followed on Twitter here: @JunoirBlaber