Kim Guadagno, Buffalo Rex, London Knicks, Mikhail Prokhorov, THE Ohio State University

Cory+Booker+Kim+Guadagno+America+Got+Talent+oYZ2UqzeQgul
Booker, Corey!

EL BARIO, BRONX – Congrats to all. We made it through another week of work.   Yours truly, Sports Deacon Blaber, is happy the weekend is here. Now, how prepared I was to talk about the weeks events, depends on your definition of prepared. Either way, I have a healthy bully sports pulpit agenda to touch on all the week’s events that caught my eye; Kim Guadagno , the Ohio State University’s NCAA Football Champs, Rex Ryan to Buffalo, The Knicks in London, Mikhail Prokhorov selling the Nets and John Tortorella.

Kim Guadagno: It is okay, I had no idea who she is either. Guadagno is 1st Lieutenant Govenor of New Jersey. She is second in command behind Governor Chris Christie. Funny enough, the 1st isn’t a ranking like 1st and 2nd lieutenant. She is the first lieutenant governor in the state’s history. The people got tired of their corrupt govs stepping down and no one set to replace them so they got the pols to create one. This is only relevant because of Lord Orange Sweater’s love of the Cowboys and trips out of state. Apparently in 2014, Lord O.S. was out the state 40 percent of the time, not a big deal. However, if he continues taking trips to see Dallas play, then one of these days he will really bite his fingers off or pull something while celebrating and be hospitalized out-of-state and someone while have to run Dirty Jerz in the interim.

Kim Guadagno and Chris Christie Meet_The_Mats
“Whoops… Jerry’s calling. Gotta go!”

The Ohio State University: In case you didn’t know it, OSU is a A Blaber Christmas Meet_The_Mattsfavorite in the Blaber household. Why? Because my Mom is from a district in the capital city of Ghana, Accra – called Osu. So, she/we root(s) for the Buckeyes… Anyway, I was surprised with how dominant they were in the Championship – despite 4 turnovers. I was also surprised to hear that QB Cardale “12 Gauge” Jones will forgo the NFL draft and return for another season and fight for the starting QB job. Notice I didn’t say go back to school to further his education. We all know how he feels about school and classes.

stat_london
We suck this much…

Buffalo Rex: “Ewwww!” That was what my fiancée said when she heard that the Buffalo Bills, who have a good defense already, chose to hire Rex Ryan as their new head coach. Now I know all the pizza and wings places in Buffalo are celebrating this hire (along with high end footcare and massage parlors), but it makes no sense. As I said, Buffalo already have a good defense and they need to sort out their offense. This was exactly the same situation Rex just got fired from in New York. It boggles the mind, because the clear choice is to bring in a head coach with a good history on offense.

Carmelo London
“Hip, hip. We were bollix. As Bob’s your uncle…”

London Knicks, are falling down, falling down… Imagine, my fair lady, that instead of the summer soccer tour where the tops clubs in Europe like Manchester United and Real Madrid (you don’t have to even like soccer to know these teams) showed up and Hull City and Atletico Bilbao came over. Now imagine these poor folks living in London and going to see an NBA regular season game. Unfortunately, the NBA sent the New York Knicks and the Milwaukee Bucks. There are no words to describe my disgust and disappointment at the fact that these guys are the ambassadors of NBA basketball overseas. The 5 and some God awful number Knicks?! We should be surprised if they don’t invite the NBA back.Mikhail Prokhorov: Apparently Ivan Drago’s taller cousin is looking to sell the majority of his share in the Brooklyn Nets. Like any rich kid, he is tired of his new toy and how much they underachieve. Watch him go buy a soccer club now.

That’s it for now. Comeback tomorrow for Cheesy Bruin.

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About Junoir Blaber 572 Articles
Junoir Blaber is from Ghana but was transplanted to the Bronx as a young lion chaser. Blaber is the Sports Rain Man, and is a featured contributor on MTM's global partner, Rugby Wrap Up. The name "Junoir" [June-noire] is his cool African name. (Or is that a possible prevarication?) He is Manute Bol's [alleged] nephew and his teams are the Mets, Jets, Knicks & NY Rangers... oh, and Manchester United. Yes, he knows soccer. [Vomit sounds]. P.s... He has webbed toes and can be followed on Twitter here: @JunoirBlaber