Broke Back Tony Romo, Ezekiel’s Reefer Madness, NFC East

"I want my money back"

Thoughts and prayers for Big Al Sternberg and his family. Life is too short.

FREEHOLD, NJ – “I Can’t Quit You.” These are the words most likely being uttered from Jason Garrett’s quivering lips as he anguishes over the latest news about Tony Romo.  

"I want my money back"
“I want my money back.”

The NFC East is up for grabs this year, as the Giants, Cowboys, Iggles and Redskins gear up for another edition of Who Wants it Less.  This division has become perennially insignificant as each team finds ways to lose. Someone, however, will be crowned Best of the Worst, so let’s break it down .

Big Blue:  Anyone who has read my offerings over the last few years, realizes that I’m as popular as Donald Trump at a Black Lives Matter Rally or Hillary Rotten Clinton at a Church confession with Giants fans.  My favorite target has been Eli Gump Manning, who is equipped with a very good receiving Corp. The caveat here is that the team spent all their cash attempting to sure up what was the worst defense in modern Giants history. If what we have seen so far in pre-season is an indicator of things to come, Eli may finally get hurt. This offensive line is horrible. The Boys of Rutherford can’t punt, pass or kick behind these stiffs… Yes, their defense appears to be improved due to Free Agency but they are far from being the next ’85 Bears. If teams score seventeen points, Big Blue will probably lose.

Yep. Pretty much sums it up.
Yep. Pretty much sums it up.

Philadelphia Eagles: 1960. That was the last time the Iggles won a championship and by all indications, that streak of futility will continue. With Sam Badford the most likely choice at QB, combined with ZERO talent at wide receiver, Eagles fans may long for Riley Cooper. Similar to the Giants, Kiladelphia purportedly has improved their D. With another questionable O-line, this group will struggle vs non division opponents.

Washington Redskins: Last season, the stars aligned and the politically incorrect Skins took advantage of their floundering rivals. Kirk Cousins was chosen over Robert RG3 Griffin in an intelligent coaching move by Brother of Chucky,  Jay  Gruden. The addition of Vernon Davis will help not only Cousins, it will help their running game, as Davis is a strong blocker. Josh Norman will join DeAngelo Hall to out mouth any opposing wide receiver. There is nothing special about this team except, perhaps, that their coach knows how not to blow it?

 " will this pick go up in smoke? "
“Will this pick go up in smoke? “

Dallas Cowboys: Most prognosticators pencilled Jerry’s Kids to take the NFC Least this season, but the asterisk was always based on Romo’s health.  Tony OhNo Romo broke again after just three plays on Thursday night vs the Seahawks. Why he was bootlegging is beyond comprehension, however one can look at Dak Prescott as the one to blame. This rookie has shown real promise while playing with the first team.  A fourth round pick (135) , Prescott is now thrust onto the center star with the future in his hands. The weapons around him are formidable – as long as first rounder Ezekiel Elliott can control his temper and Reefer Madness.  Albert Morris just may be the best signing of the offseason, creating depth in the backfield. If Dez Bryant can stay on the field, Dallas may have a shot.

Who Wants It Least?  Time will tell!

By all means chime in with your best shots and come back tomorrow for my little cousin, Matt McCarthy, affectionately known as Short Matt.  And please follow us on Twitter – @MeetTheMatts and like our Facebook page, Meet The Matts. Thank you.

 

Share Button
About GrindingAx 135 Articles
"Grinding Ax" Walter Hynes (GAW) comes from the same Sports Royalty bloodlines as Short Matt... He's heaving hatchets off the heads of any deserving Sports Personalities... His favorite teams are the NY Rangers, Detroit Tigers, Dallas Cowboys, NY Jets and Manchester United... A suburban husband and father of two, Walter understands what it takes to be a second-guessing, sideline-heckling parent and coach.