SUSQUEHANNA, PA – It’s a good thing I’m along for the ride in visiting this university and sitting through the welcoming video presentation and intimate conversation about this very impressive institution. The young graduate admissions intern who is a sports reporter hopeful boasted about the River Hawks #5-ranked rugby team. Imagine a decent-looking female version of Short Matt, minus the bombastic personality. Who loves ya, Boss? That this young lady mentioned rugby and sports journalism reminded me of today’s chore; Cheesy Bruins Free NFL Picks. And what a chore picking NFL winners has been in this ever-sh*tty 2020. That said, here are the picks. Just reverse ‘em and you’re going to benefit.
FAVORITE
There are plenty of bad teams to bet against this year of which the Cowboys, Giants, Vikings and Jets are all included. I’d rather listen to Benny & The Jets or the ‘80’s pop group of the same name or see the Jets in West Side Story because all three are more entertaining options than watching Gang Green try to play football. One of if not the worst NFL head coach in Adam Gase is pitted against the upstart Bills. This shapes up as an early second half TKO. I’d lay thirty points with the road Bills today. The Pick? Buffalo Bills -10 over NEW YORK JETS
UNDERDOG
I could have very easily included the Texans in with the football dreck I’ve witnessed so far. One fired coach and an interim coach off the awful Bill Belichik lineage and zero running game or defense has the Lone Star state looking for decent football. This one smells as bad as what Houston is producing- the 4-1 Packers visit as small favorites (only three and a hook?) against this 1-5 bag of crap. I don’t know how the hell they do it but if the Pack looks to good to pass up it’s better to do so. The Pick? HOUSTON TEXANS +3.5 over Green Bay Packers
OVER
Should Baker Mayfield fail to put up a thirty-spot at the very least against the Bungles, the franchise needs to look for yet another signal caller. Some teams are historically awful at filling certain positions on a team: Lions running backs, Bears QBs, Mets relievers and 3rd basemen to name a few. Baker’s Cleveland house may be on the market sooner than he ever imagined especially with his young opponent who is already making Mayfield second fiddle in professional Ohio football. Desperation sometimes fuels performance. The Pick? Cleveland/CINCINNATI OVER 50.5
UNDER
Lots of times I ignore trends but I’m hoping on a very unlikely one. The Chiefs and their explosive offense are four of six to the under and rather than explain why this is happening, I’m riding the wave as the Broncos are fresh off a six field goal effort last week and play a decent brand of defense. The Pick? KC/DENVER UNDER 44
That’s it. Leave your 2 bits below and come back tomorrow for our Lake Erie
wave-rider, Junoir Blaber.
