BLOOMINGBURG, NY – Amazin’. Not the Mets, but Derrick Henry. A week after feeding him the rock thirty-four times against the Patriots, he’s at it again as I pen this post against the ten-point choice Baltimore Ravens. A sixty-yard run capped off by a jump pass touchdown? Smash mouth meets schoolyard football – gotta love it! Anyway, I was 3-1 last week but I sent Angry Ward a text before the Vikes game yesterday and was terribly wrong on that one, as Minny shot themselves in the foot repeatedly in the second half to make him more surly than normal. Just the same, I’m here with some can’t-miss (until they miss) Cheesy Bruin’s Free NFL Picks to help you beat your man.
Houston Texans @ Kansas City Chiefs, 3:05 p.m.
Had the Texans played a more seasoned team and head coach last week they’d be at home watching the rest of the playoffs with most of America today. Instead, they get to travel to a chilly Kansas City and that usually doesn’t bode well for indoor teams. You can say domed teams are doomed in these situations. What’s to scare the Chiefs defense who has jelled at the correct time? The running game isn’t frightening. Without a second outlet to throw to, DeAndre Hopkins can be double or triple-teamed to ineffectiveness, as the perpetually-injured Will Fuller XVI (or some Roman numeral) is a game-time decision. Kenny “Suite Judy Blue Eyes” Stills (MTM Edit Staff is flummoxed by this one) is also questionable and so is any hope of the Texans even coming remotely close to covering the pointspread here. I don’t really care if Travis Kelce plays or not. The Chiefs are going to threaten the OVER all by themselves. Houston’s defense is a joke and the quarterback-head coach marriage is crucial in playoff football to which you have to cede to Mahomes-Reid by a longshot over Watson-O’Brien. This is a bloodletting in the making. The Picks? Kansas City -9,5 and OVER 51.5
Seattle Seahawks @ Green Bay Packers, 6:40 p.m.
Something has to give in Green Bay today. The Seahawks were 7-1 on the road in the regular season (they won in Philly last week, too) and the Pack were 7-1 at home. There are holes in each team’s offensive attack. Seattle is down to the un-retired Marshawn Lynch and some Homer guy at running back while the Packers boast names like Lazard, Valdes-Scantling, and Geronimo!!! at receiver. The quarterback play is enough to offset the deficiencies, however and Aaron Jones isn’t too bad as a dual threat either. The line in this game is the lowest of the weekend but I don’t see this being as close a contest as Las Vegas thinks. I’m not even sure it’s a defensive struggle. Close for a half, yes but I can see the ‘Hawks tiring in the second half and the wheels coming off in the process. To throw out a score, how about 38-20 GB. Which means Green Bay -4 and OVER 45.5
Comment below and come back tomorrow for a guy that is OVER before he starts, Junoir Blaber.