This Whole Twitter Thing

The Twitterverse- Our very own Lori Levine, when not sullying her reputation by hanging out at this site, is better known as Howard Stern’s hottest fan. And Howard himself is the self-proclaimed “King of all Media.”

Young Howard . . . Dreamy

That’s an awfully tenuous connection to me, but nevertheless I’m gonna use it to hereby start styling myself The Clown Prince of Several Media. I’ve been going at it on MtM for nearly a year now, one of my two regular side gigs (I also write monthly for 3QuarksDaily.com). In terms of solo gigs, I’ve had my own site and FaceBook page for a while as well.  But this week marks a disturbing turn in a new direction.

I be all tweetin’ and whatnot.

As I’ve explained elsewhere, this is a rather bizarre development. I don’t even have a cell phone. Yet here I am now, ensconced in the twittery realm of 160 characters or less, on the go, at a moment’s notice.

So how did this happen? How did a man whose flat panel TV is hooked up to rabbit ears (complete with tin foil extenders), and whose DSL-desktop doesn’t even have a wireless router, manage to stumble into the world of Twitter?

Well, ya know, all the cool kids are doing it. That’s number one first and foremost. I mean, if The Public Professor only teaches you one thing, let it be that peer pressure, superficial status markers, and the quest for approval by people who only pretend to like you are the signs of a life well lived.

I am all about that.

Oh, and by “all the cool kids,” I meant all of all of us hacks at MtM.

So come aboard. Let’s “follow” each other like creepy, mutual online stalkers. I’m at:

@publicprofessor

Me tweeting

Okay, now for the good stuff. For 16 Saturdays, I’m gonna give you a little insight into the NFL team I know best, the Pittsburgh Steelers. While I don’t bet them myself because I don’t want my heart to be conflicted in any way while watching them, I’m more than happy to share my half-assed wisdom with the masses.

This week Pittsburgh’s +1.5 in the season opener at Baltimore, with an O/U of 36.

Take the points. Not only is Pittsburgh a slightly better all-around team, but they own Joe Flacco. They’re in his head, man!

I also like the over. Pittsburgh’s offense these days can realistically be classified as high-flyin’, while Baltimore upgraded the WR position with Lee Evans. No he’s not as complete a receiver as the dearly departed Derek Mason, but he’s a better fit; he can stretch the field, opening things up underneath for Anquan Bolden and giving Flacco his first-ever legitimate deep threat. On the flip side, the Ravens D is still very good but not as fiersome as it used to be, while the Steelers are very vulnerable at CB. That all adds up to an Over in my book.

I’d be surprised if Pitt and the Over didn’t at least split, in part because I’m having trouble imagining a scenario where Baltimore wins and this game is under.  So go crazy.  But remember, I get a cut, payable in Funyuns and Dr. Pepper.

In my totally legal King of the Hill pool, me and most of the world like Houston over the Manningless Colts.

Alright, that’s all for now.  See you next week, and in the meantime, let’s tweet it up! Tomorrow come back for the man who set up my first illegal bookie bet . . . in the 8th grade. I shit you not. Mr. Cheesy Bruin.

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About The Public Professor 79 Articles
Mattville's George Plimpton, The Public Professor, is indeed a real, honest-to-goodness, legitimate professor at a major Maryland university. But because he doesn't have a cell phone or cable, he's crazy enough to be with us. A member of Angry Ward's Urban Spur Posse, the terrorized Bronx graffiti artist's by correcting their grammar. His loves? The Yankees, Knicks, NY Rangers and the Pittsburgh Steelers. He also has a real website: ThePublicProfessor.com (https://www.thepublicprofessor.com/).