NEW YORK, NY – After spending an hour and a half dealing with Sprint incompetency, yours truly was able to locate the phone he dropped while walking the dog after midnight. 
Was I a bit drunky-face after being out with the ^TUBAS (Touring University [at] Buffalo Alumni Side)? Yes. But Jesus H. Christ, Sprint requests that you get a code sent to your phone when you try to login to their website to trace your phone. It took ripping them to shreds on Twitter with screenshots of their Knicks-like ineptness to get them to allow the code to be emailed. Oh, and then I had to get a third party app to locate the Samsung phone, because they only support iPhones for locating. Time to change things, Sprint. But speaking of change, let’s get to today’s topics…
FIZZLESS KNICKS
Who is the happiest guy on the planet right now, Steve Cohen, Eli Manning? No. It’s David Fizdale. The Knicks will be on the hook for remaining 3 years of Fizdale’s contract. Guess how much: 5 mil? 8 mil? Guess again. Try $17,000,000.00. That’s 17 million reasons to smile. Moreover, he has Gregg Popovich and Steve Kerr coming out in his defense. Here’s Popovich popping off:
“I don’t know where the decision was made to fire Coach Fizdale, but if it came from the top, it’s a case of mistaken identity. He’s a fine, talented young coach with a great pedigree, and it’s ridiculous to think you’re gonna bring a young guy in and after being there a minute and a half, you expect him to fix everything that’s been wrong there for a long time. That’s pretty unfair. So, it’s the old analogy: he got thrown under the bus. He’ll come out of it because he’s a great coach
“If I had gone to New York that would have been me like three years ago. I’m well aware of that. So I think I made the right choice… I’m a big fan of David — he’s a helluva coach. As we know in this business, it’s fragile. Your job is dependent on a lot of things. The talent you coach, but just as important, the strength of the organization and group around you. It takes a really strong organization to help coaches and players get through difficult times.”
Congrats, Coach. You escaped your Hell on Earth with generational wealth.
Which segues nicely to…
METS FANS PURGATORY
Five years can go in the blink of an eye or take forever, depending on your perspective/station in life. For a guy in jail, it may take an eternity. For a professional athlete, it can go in an eye-blink. But for those of us on this planet rooting for the Mets, the 60 months we must wait for Steve Cohen to kick the Wilpons out of the front office will be Fan Purgatory. Please, God, don’t let them f**k things up too much while we serve our sentence.
ELI MANNING
This is for fellow NY Giants fans. If you do anything but give Eli Manning a standing ovation and cheer for him at every turn when he plays next, consider yourself/selves to be a true piece of sh*t. Simply put, we should all collectively and repeatedly say Thank you, Eli.
And thank you for stopping by. Please feel free to chime in below and be sure to come back tomorrow a man that exudes confidence while flatulating, Cheesy Bruin.
^The University at Buffalo Bulls rugby team were previously the Mad Turtles when yours truly played there. The recent growth of the game in the USA had the current regime change that name and team colors to match that of UB’s other teams. That’s poop as far as many of us are concerned but hey, change is inevitable, right?
