Thank God It’s Angry Ward Friday!: Finish Your February Watching These (Sports?) Movies

BRONX, NY – Late this morning, Short Matt reached out to me and some other poor “contributor” with a 914 area code, with yet another in a long line of sob stories of why he couldn’t fulfill his blogging obligations this morning. Boo hoo. On second thought… just BOO! Anyway, here I am, after lunch, filling space. Let’s get to it!

As we finally crawl out of February and head into March (or, did they end up adding that 13th month, SMARCH?) there’s not a ton of fun sports stuff to focus on, so here’s a list of movies that kinda fit this time of year and I’m going to allow you to watch. I’ll try to fit some sports ones in here of course and, naturally, start with the best.

Hot Dog: The Movie. Yass, friends, it’s time for the greatest bad ski movie ever. I just heard that parts of Southern California might get seven feet of snow over the next few days, so fire up Harkin Banks, Dan O’Callahan, Squirrel Murphy, Rudi Garmisch, and The Chinese Downhill. You know how I feel about this one. Nuff said.

Lost in Translation. Basically Bill Murray hanging out at an awesome hotel bar in Tokyo. There’s also a scene where Bill’s swimming in an equally awesome pool, so we’re gonna count this as sports. Throw in Scarlett Johansson and Anna Faris doing a hilarious Cameron Diaz impersonation, and what’s not to like?

Waking Ned Devine. In Ireland, the lottery is considered sports… I think. Anyway, a couple of old rascals trying to pull a fast one is always a good premise. Of course this movie is something of a knockoff of a much better movie….

Local Hero. Starring Animal House’s Peter Riegert, Burt Lancaster, and featuring all sorts of great performances from lesser-known actors, this movie will make you want to go to Scotland, live in a small town among the locals, and never come back.

Fastbreak and The Fish that Saved Pittsburgh. Two very distinct and weirdly classic basketball movies from 1979. Why the hell not? Hey, Bernard King is in Fastbreak and Julius Irving is in Fish. Check ’em out!

Any Baseball Movie that Includes Spring Training. Of course Major League is included, and I’m going to allow The Natural because Roy Hobbs never quite makes it to Spring Training, but seems on his way there at the beginning.

Okay, that’s a fairly decent fill-in for me for today. Come back tomorrow for me, maybe? Ya never know.

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About Angry Ward 774 Articles
Angry Ward, who has admirers at the New York Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but for one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way Nancy Pelosi embraces Mitch McConnell at charity events. And while his Vikings only tease him with success, his Golden State Warriors actually win these days. A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, "The Franchise." (Junoir Blaber disputes this). Vent, curse and giggle with him on Angry Ward Wednesdays.