NEW YORK, NY – Days like this, you don’t get ’em back. The planets aligned, pigs were flying, snowballs were being tossed in Hell. 
We found ourselves downright giddy presiding over the Perfect Sports Day. In fact, while we were soaping each other down in the MTM Showers after Bobby Parnell finished what Matt Harvey started, we found ourselves singing…
Blue skies smilin’ at me
Nothin’ but blue skies do I see
Bluebirds singin’ a song
Nothin’ but bluebirds all day long
But blue has a different meaning in NYC’s other borough – the Bronx.
Japanese Manicure: In WWII the Japanese were infamous for their work with fingernails. Perhaps Hiroki Kuroda was channeling his ancestors when he thrust his pitching fingers at a line drive up the box? Or was it that he was just being dopey? 
We say both. Either way, he succumbed in the third, getting knocked out with bruised fingers and loosened nails early in the game. That enabled the Sawx to maintain a 2-game lead over the Yanks – who are now dead last in the AL East.
Harvey Wallbangers: Somebody forgot to tell Matt Harvey that the Padres were actually a Major League team and that Spring Training was over. The Pads hit like Popes in the 7 innings Harv hung 10 Ks on them, and Ike Kingman and Lucas Duda hit absolute bombs in another whitewashing. The Mets now find themselves tied for first place in the tight NL East, with success the aging Bronx Bombers can only dream about. Watch for MLB 2013 Comeback Player of the Year, Dillon Gee, complete the sweep today at 1pm.
Goodbye Gabby: While with the New York Rangers, sharp-shooting Marian Gaborik ran hot and cold. When he was hot, his unwillingness to dig in the corners, take a hit or block a shot were okay. When he was cold, though, his -8 rating was reason enough to explore a trade for him. Add 7.5 million other reasons and carting him off to Columbus in the Blue Jackets‘ private jet – President John Davidson flew in to Teterboro to pick him up – was a no-brainer. And if last night’s trade was any indication, Glen Sather made the Deal of the Decade.
Ten Ball: How about them Knicks! Ten wins in a row, cruising without a fully healthy squad, Mike Woodson looking like a real and respected coach – Dude, Nick Erbocker, Sams-A-Fan and Tall Matt must be happy. But vinny from brooklyn would warn that the Newark Nets of Brooklyn are staying nearly as hot – spanking the Cavs in Cleveland. They will be heard from in the playoffs.
QUESTIONS FOR YOU:
1) What the bleep happened to today’s scheduled columnist, Cam James?
2) Will the Mets and/or Yankees play .500 ball this year?
3) Out of the 3 local hockey teams, who will make the playoffs?
4) Will the Knicks or Nets go deeper into the playoffs?
5) Will the Minnesota Wild or Seattle Mariners give Angry Ward an aneurysm first? It’s rumored that he stayed up to watch the Wild lose in San Jose last night.
6) Is Jimmy Fallon Tonight Show worthy?
Different Matt tomorrow.
