12 In 12: Twelve Reasons Why Cardinals Repeat

Cam James and fellow Die Hard St Louis sports fans. St. Louis sucks.
“C”… (a chubby Cam James) & his boys give Reasons Cardinals Repeat

ST. LOUIS, MO – Up until 2006, at the end of the regular season I would get a giddy effervescent feeling – something akin to a to how (I’m guessing) a last first kiss feels… Then invariably, some douche bag named any of the following: Glavine, Bonds, Oswalt, Piazza, the entire 2004 Red Sox, would come and kick my proverbial dog in the face.  But in 2006 that all changed.  The Birds got a ring that I was alive for.  All of a sudden it was a new ballgame. No longer was I pleased with a playoff berth or a series win.  Since 2006, the city of St. Louis has been hungrier for championships than Lindsay Lohan is for blow… or like I am for Lindsay Lohan. Yes, I would still take that to Pound Town.

Last year’s 11 In 11 Cardinals team (11th tittle in 2011) had arguably the greatest second-half finish to make the playoffs ever. They then had the greatest playoff run in the divisional era. The core of the 2012 team all won last year and they are battle-hardened.  In addition to all of the experience, here are another Twelve Reasons Why Cardinals Repeat 12 In 12:

1: Johny Cueto:  Somehow the Cardinals managed to skip Stephen Strasburg and they will not have to face Cueto due to injury.  So, all of a sudden you take the best offensive team in the league and match them up against a team without an ace until the World SeriesDone-zo12 In 12.

2: Dusty Baker:  Dusty Baker is quite simply the worst manager in baseball. The man rejects on-base percentage as an important measuring stick for performance.  He has never won a World Series. In every situation his team was successful, the GM called all of the shots. The Reds are good now because of Walt Jocketty.  And where did he used to work? Oh yeah, for the Cardinals.  Add a recent stroke to his incompetence and you will have the newest Bartmans lining up to wreck his NLCS hopes.

3: Home field advantage in the Fall Classic. Yes, as ridiculous and terrible as it might sound, the Cardinals will have home field in the World Series as the second wild card simply because some ret@rds tied an All-Star Game a decade ago.  I say… THANKS!  It certainly helped last year. Sorry Different Matt. I know this bugs you.

4: TBS: I hate MLB and TBS because they have spent the entire week making sure that the Yankees are on during prime time.  Thus, I couldn’t watch Tuesday or Wednesday ( I listened).   This is a good thing however because no one is paying attention to the cards and they are flying pressure free into the NLCS.

5: Chris Carpenter has a 10-2 postseason record.  6 shutout innings against the Nats and he has only thrown 3 other outings this season. If there is one Major League pitcher that looks like and has the Characteristics of Iceman,  it is The Carp.

Bullpen crane needed?

6: Justin Verlander will not be in the World Series.

7: CC Sabathia won’t be able to start Game 1 of the World Series because no aircraft can get him there.

8: Kyle Lohse is undefeated when I wear his jersey and I am at the game.  Yes, I have a Kyle Lohse jersey.  That is commitment. This being said i will be at a game he is pitching at it will be in new york.

 9: New York Metropolitans …. are golfing.

10: Mike Shannon The Cardinals are one of the only teams left with a stalwart radio announcer who just doesn’t give a rat’s tile.  For that he will call another World Series title. Check out his shannonisms.

11: Enough said 11 in 11 was a great feat, why not repeat champions?

12: The size of the pack of condoms David Freeze will need when he wins his second World Series MVP in two years.



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About Cam James 128 Articles
Cam James hails from Missouri and is a down-the-line St. Louis fan: Rams, Cards, Blues... Thus his occasional "Ram Rules" column. He hates Kansas basketball, lives in Denver, been a wrestler, dabbled in Ultimate Fighting and plays hardball. Oh, and he's Opie Taylor white.