NFL Championship Picks, Russell Wilson vs Colin Kaepernick, and Don Cherry

wilson
Not Don Cherry

THUNDER BAY, ONTARIO – Much ado is always made whenever you have a glamorous QB match-up like Manning-Brady in Denver today, which I’ll get to in a minute but the young signal-callers in the NFC Championship game are equally intriguing even if viewed through a slightly skewed lens.

Major League Baseball draft Russell Wilson and Colin Kaepernick were baseball draft picks, the Orioles selected the former in 2007 (41st Round) while the Cubs chose the latter in the 43rd Round (2009). Two years apart, two rounds apart, and by two dreadful teams–football was the wiser choice.
Edge: Even

Religion… In case you haven’t heard an interview or presser, both are outwardly Christian and part of the God Squad. Wilson reportedly saw Jesus (not Phoebe Cates?) in a dream as a teenager and today posts Bible verses on Twitter while Kaepernick saw Him on the walls of a tattoo parlor and posts scripture on his own skin to kiss after touchdowns.
Edge: Even (God has no favorites)

imagesAwards and Playoff records: After a Rookie of the Year campaign in 2012, Wilson was also named to the Pro Bowl and again in 2013 and is 2-1 in the post season… Kaepernick won the Humanitarian Bowl MVP (2008) in a losing effort and is 4-1 with two championship game appearances.
Edge: Even

mtm Fantasy IslandOther Wilson was a stranded Tom Hanks‘ friend in Castaway. Kaepernick was cast away at birth by his teenaged mother and later adopted. Wilson was Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor’s neighbor in Home Improvement. Russell has only lost one game at home in two years. Colin’s neighbors may want to be on the lookout for his 115-pound pet tortoise. America sees more of Colin’s tattoos now than Fantasy Island’s Herve Villechaize on ABC back in the day.
Edge: Wilson
Prediction: Seattle 21, San Fran 20

Peyton Manning neck MRIDenver is the site of the AFC Championship game where one can only hope Mr. Bundchen and Bill Belichick get their heads handed to them by Peyton Manning and his walking billboard of a Homer Simpson forehead. How long before someone at corporate slaps a Papa John’s bumper sticker on that noggin? Ending their second season together, John Fox and Manning are the antithesis to the Brady-Belichick marriage that has lasted thirteen seasons. Fox is a very likeable guy with heart problems and Belichick gives heart problems to those outside the New England area. Brady dates and impregnates actresses and super models, while Peyton has his parents introduce their son to the girl next door. The N.E. QB throws the occasional sideline fit, while Manning is always composed.

"I wanna see FIVE for fighting!"
“I wanna see FIVE for fighting!”

Outside of being great skiing destinations the only significant and pleasant similitude of the two cities is hockey related. The legendary coach and current hockey savant Don Cherry spent five noteworthy seasons behind my beloved Boston Bruins’ bench and immediately after his dismissal, steered the original-named Colorado Rockies for one tumultuous season between he and management. With Lanny MacDonald as his best forward and Rob Ramage the best defensemen (at a minus-40) “Grapes” didn’t last long in Colorado and neither does Belichick, today. Broncos 41-20.

Please comment below and come back tomorrow for West Coast Craig.

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About Cheesy Bruin 491 Articles
A man amongst men. Cheesy Bruin kicked cancer to the curb - twice. The Cheese Man's a big, tough teddy-bear who survived the Bronx despite being an unabashed Boston Bruins fan and Sargent-At-Arms for Angry Ward's Urban Spur Posse. Nuff said. Doctors have taken most of this throat and had to make him a new tongue from thigh-meat (his own) and still he won't shut up about the Bruins, Cowboys, Pirates and Cleveland Cavaliers. And yes, his kids do love him.

20 Comments

  1. It’s 9.30 am on the West Coast which means I drank too much scotch last night and I’m late for having my machaca burrito.Now to kill 2 1/2 hours until the games start. I won’t do it by talking about hockey or that MY San Diego State Aztecs won again vs. UNLV last night. Nope….let’s talk about me betting $20 on New England–yes New England—If I can’t pick a winning horse then this’ll surely do them in. I do feel sorry for Brady though…that nag of a wife will be bitchin’ & moaning for days again.
    The Book of Yim says Conference Championship games demand nachos be eaten….and wings ,of course—always wings!

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