FROZEN, TUNDRA, CT – Hey, guess what’s coming on Sunday?! If you’re in the Northeast.. more f*cking SNOW! I saw ‘BIG STORM!’ on the forecast as I was on the treadmill this morning and I nearly flung myself off in agony. But you know what?!?!? I’m an optimist…and I thought this week I’d share what I’m hoping for in terms of Oscar winners when we get the envelope (please) this Sunday. (I mean… sure… I’m happy its gonna be March, but did you expect me to cover that ill named “March Madness?!?!”)
Though I’d be remiss if I were not to mention which of the nominated movies I’ve seen, and which I’ve haven’t. As seeing movies that aren’t rated G is a rarity (though I will say, The Lego Movie is assembled QUITE well for the enjoyment of all ages), there are a few I’ve seen and noted my take on the ones I’ve not.
American Hustle: Saw it, dug it, well developed flick creating empathy for each character.
Captain Phillips: Havent’ seen it; hate Tom Hanks, possible Pay-Per-View movie I may see twenty-minutes of before falling asleep on my couch
Philomena: Haven’t seen it, my mother saw it and raved about it, looks like a bunch of old ladies are in it, odds on not seeing it unless under duress
Dallas Buyers Club: Saw it, loved it, made me feel really hungry.
Twelve Years a Slave: Haven’t seen it, would like to see it, probably catch on PPV and fight an epic battle not to fall asleep on my couch, which would be no fault of the movie.
Gravity: Saw it on a, ahem, smaller screen, very impressed by the visual effects AND… THAT IS ALL
Her: Haven’t seen it, dig Spike Jones (whose name makes this a sports-related column), would like to catch it and likely PPV.
The Wolf of Wall Street: Saw it. Liked it. Made me wanna try ‘ludes. Some lagging parts had me not understanding why EVERY Scorcese movie MUST be THREE HOURS LOOOOONG!!
Nebraska: Haven’t seen it, would like to see it. Harry K., my high school friend… well.. his Mom, June Squibb was nominated, so I will see this for sure.
Best Actor: Christian Bale (American Hustle), Bruce Dern (Nebraska), Leonardo DiCaprio (The Wolf of Wall Street), Chiwetel Ejiofor (12 Years a Slave), Matthew McConaughey (Dallas Buyers Club)
COOKIE’s PICK: Matthew McConaughey (Dallas Buyers Club).
This is a tough one, but I think the Academy is gonna give it to the guy who lost a bazillion pounds for a film, and a pretty important one at that. I would note that Christian Bale is WAY overdue for an Oscar as well, and I’m sure McConaughey took Bale’s diet from when he cut weight for The Machinist.
Cookie’s Crumb: I’m suddenly hungry.
Best Actress: Amy Adams (American Hustle), Cate Blanchett (Blue Jasmine), Sandra Bullock (Gravity), Judi Dench (Philomena), Meryl Streep (August Osage County)
COOKIE’s PICK: Amy Adams, American Hustle. She won the Golden Globe for this and I think the Academy will follow here, as it often does.
Cookie’s Crumb: If Sandra Bullock wins for breathing heavy and screaming in Gravity, I will media blackout myself from these Academy Awards moving forward… FOREVVER!! BLACK HOLE!
Best Supporting Actor: Barkad Abdi (Captain Phillips), Jared Leto (Dallas Buyers Club), Bradley Cooper (American Hustle), Michael Fassbender (12 Years a Slave), Jonah Hill (The Wolf of Wall Street).
COOKIE’s PICK: Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club. Leto was good and also won the Globe for this. I don’t think the performance beats the others, but the Academy will give it to him for being skinny, AIDS ridden and in drag.
Cookie’s Crumb: Jonah Hill in The Wolf of Wall Street was MOST excellent. He is deserving.
Best Supporting Actress: Sally Hawkins, Jennifer Lawrence (American Hustle), June Squibb (Nebraska), Julia Roberts (August: Osage County), Lupita Nyong’o
COOKIE’s PICK: Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle. What an incredible performance. I never saw The Hunger Games and could easily hate her for that teen crap that makes my stomach churn more than chick flicks, but her performance in American Hustle was a standout.
Cookie’s Crumb: I would ABSOLUTELY be OVER THE MOON if June Squibb, my friend Harry’s mom won for her role in Nebraska. Unfortunately, she’s not that well known and I just don’t think it’s going to happen. If it does… you’ll hear me screaming from CT. And watch for my friend Harry on the red carpet with her. He’s been on all the other awards season walks with her and he makes the GREATEST sarcastic faces.
Best Animated Film: The Croods, Despicable Me 2, Ernest & Celestine, Frozen, The Wind Rises
COOKIE’s PICK: Despicable Me 2. In this case the sequel beats an already good movie.
Cookie’s Crumb: Frozen was a deceptively advertised movie for the previews and I took one of my boys to see a f*cking princess movie. If he’d have asked, I’d have been fine, but he didn’t. Disney owes me some goddamn coin. A*sholes. If The Lego Movie were out in time in 2013, it would have slaughtered every other film it ran against. Yea. It was THAT good.
And with that, I’m going to continue to shop for a dress for the gala occurring on my couch(likely fleece as it’s supposed to snow here, again), and drink up in a continuing effort to up my tolerance.
Come back tomorrow for someone who we all have come to tolerate, Junoir Blaber.
