Big Ben Tuesday – Angry NFL Grumblings: Controversial Plays from NFL Week 8, a Chaperone Service for NFL Athletes

This man does not need to pad his stats

Stamford, CT: Sooooo, the Giants are garbage, the Red Sox just won another World Series and sang New York New York in the clubhouse, and the Rangers rebuild is a long way from bearing fruit. I may quit watching sports. How about some NFL Week 8 Observations? Let’s get this over with.

This man does not need to pad his stats


In one of the most talked about gambling moments since Don Beebe knocked the football out of a prematurely celebrating Leon Lett’s hand, Todd Gurley pulled up and did not score a TD which would have covered the spread and pushed the points over. Gamblers and fantasy boobs were furious. Said Gurley, the man with more stupid pun fantasy team names than anyone, “man, forget fantasy and forget Vegas today. We got the win, so that’s all that matters.”

Hey, he might be right. I remember my grandfather talking about a time when the result of the game mattered. Props to Gurley.


Gurley only had a chance to make that play because of someone else’s boneheaded play. The Rams kicked a FG to take the lead by two. But they left the great Aaron Rodgers with over two minutes to get his team in position for a winning FG.

The soon to be ex-Packer

The Packers had no timeouts, so with 2:09 left, Ty Montgomery was told to take a knee on the kickoff. That would give Rodgers a play before the two minute warning where he could try something down the middle of the field knowing the clock would stop for the two minute warning.

But Montgomery, reportedly pissed because he was taken out of the game in the previous offensive series, decided to spurn the coaches and take it out from a few yards deep. To nobody’s surprise, he fumbled. That’ll teach ’em, Ty.

Not the face of a guy who can turn your team around


That’s the difference between the careers of Brady and Rodgers in a nutshell. No returner on a Bellichick team would have taken that thing out of the end zone. Brady has never had to deal with stupid, angry third string RBs/former WRs taking the ball out of his hands with the game on the line.

How do you fire a coach who in a half season won two and half times as many games as he did in the two previous seasons combined? I kid, Hue Jackson didn’t win one single road game in 40 games as the Browns’ head coach. How is that even possible? The Browns have plenty of young talent and we should have seen more progress. I’m not sure if Bountygate Williams is the right guy, but Hue had to shoo.

The Patriots always seem to have stinker games like last night when they have a big one coming up next. Sure, the Bills were fired up and played good defense, so you can chalk it up to a classic trap game. But I think it’s more than that.

I’m pretty sure they spent about a day last week preparing for the Bills, then immediately moved on to planning for their Sunday night clash with Green Bay. That’s a big advantage for the Pats, as the Packers had a strong game plan to slow down the Rams, and probably would have pulled it off it not for Ty’s angry blunder. The Pats are good coming out of a bye.

Montgomery probably would have been cut by now, but the Packers knew he would have been scooped up by the RB needy Patriots if only to get some more inside info on the Pack.

Why can’t Josh Gordon get it together? He’s going to be my first client when I launch my chaperone business for NFL athletes.

Hey Plax, why don’t we leave the gun in the car. I’ll run out and get it if you need? Can we at least take the bullets out? Put the safety on?

Yes, you can go in the bathroom with Mr. Roethlisberger after you sign this consent form.”

Hold on Johnny. Sorry, I meant Johnny Football. Let me see that before you post it? No, pretending a huge wad of cash is a cell phone is not a good look. Give me the phone.”

Come back tomorrow for Angry Ward and more giant wads of cash. Follow us on Twitter at @BenWhit8, @MeetTheMatts, @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and like our Facebook page, Meet The Matts.

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About Ben Whitney 342 Articles
Ben Whitney comes from journalistic stock. Aside from his brothers, rumor has that his great-great grandfather was the youngest brother of Eli Whitney and covered the earliest "rounders" games. Big Ben is also another New York Rugby Club player/pal of Different Matt, Short Matt and Junoir Blaber. He likes film noir discussions, has twin girls and took up ice hockey after retiring from rugby.