Tag: Jimmy Garoppolo
Big Ben Tuesday: Rapid Fire NFL Week 15 and Hedging Giants’ Misery
Indianapolis, IN: NFL Week 15 is in the books and we’re separating the contenders from the pretenders, the wheat from the chaff, and the wanna-bes and the bes. Let’s rapid fire this b!tch. Eli Manning was playing his way back onto the Giants’ 2018 roster, said the NFL Network last week. Whoops. It was a […]
Big Ben Whitney: Rocky IV, Yankees Make a Push, Year the Pats Unraveled
MOSCOW, USSR – It’s been over 32 years since Rocky Balboa avenged his friend and formal rival and turned the tide of the Cold War on Christmas Day in 1985. Much to Rock’s chagrin, tensions with Russia have returned. (Do you smell a corny, contrived device coming yet?) In the spirit of that legendary night, […]
Big Ben Freaky Tuesday: Josh McCown, Tom Brady Swap Swap Careers
Stamford, CT: The QB firedrill is about to kick into high gear, with free agency set to begin on Wednesday. When Kirk Cousins flaps his butterfly wings and chooses his landing spot, the repercussions will flutter across the league. The losers will be scrambling to decide whether to make a push for Case Keenum, Teddy Bridgewater, […]
Big Ben’s Sports Oscars: Kobe Bryant Won an Oscar, But These Teams Got Snubbed
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Scrolling through Twitter late Sunday night I called out to my wife, “Kobe Bryant won an Oscar and Larry Bird got snubbed?” “No,” dumbass, “Lady Bird got snubbed. But Kobe did win an Oscar.” Well, I didn’t see that coming, and it wasn’t great timing for the #MeToo movement. But hey, in […]
Big Ben’s Super Bowl Recap: Brick Hands Brady Terminated by Pederson’s Mighty Balls
Now that the Super Bowl is over, it’s time to talk about the Knicks. They suck. Now back to football. That game had more plot twists than the episode of This is Us that followed. You know, according to my wife. I didn’t watch it. Anyhoo, let’s try to make some sense of one wild […]
Big Ben’s Worst Super Bowl Match-up Ever Preview: Getting in Brady’s Head, What’s a Giants Fan To Do? Go Pats?!
MINNEAPOLIS, MN – I am trying to find something to care about in the Worst Super Bowl Match-up Ever. When I heard about Tom Brady’s hand injury ahead of the AFC Championship Game, it seemed like classic Belichick superfuge. This is a guy who does not use the “probable” designation or give more than a […]
Big Ben’s Wildcard Ramblings: Saints and Giants Trading Places, Belichick Losing it, Andy Reid Chokes Again
STAMFORD, CT – I don’t know who told you I forget to write something for today, but it’s a lie. A very stable genius like me would never forget, in spite of a late hockey game and one-year old twins who just would not let me sleep last night. I’m not stalling at all right […]
Big Ben Tuesday – One Giant Display of Crap, Surprise Contenders in the NFC
Stamford, CT: At this point in the football season I expected to be breaking down the New York Giants pushing for the playoffs. Yeah, no. Man, what a train wreck. Then again, “train wreck” is not a big enough disaster to describe this bunch. Unless you like watching players quit, Sunday was another pathetic display. And […]
Big Ben’s Two for Tuesday: the Browns’ Mind Numbing Bumbling and New Hope for the Knicks
“I like this one. One dog goes one way and the other goes the other way. And this guy’s sayin’, ‘whaddya you want from me?’” Tommy DeVito, Goodfellas. Stamford, CT: It’s a tale of two teams, the Cleveland Browns and the New York Knicks. Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse for the Browns, the […]
FREE NFL FUN: Cheesy Bruin’s Free NFL Picks, Notes, NFL Cheerleaders
NOTE: Management realizes this is MLB Playoffs time, but Cheesy Bruin is now a Mets fan, so baseball season is apparently over for him. MARLBORO, NY – I’m in a crappy mood. Why? My back is acting up – as spinal stenosis will do that to ya – and my Cheesy Bruin’s Free NFL Picks […]
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