Mets Can’t Stop The Music

Cheesy Bruins-ComputerFLUSHING, NY – The New York Mets action on the field this year has been foreign to anything resembling what is expected of a Major League Baseball team. It’s only fitting the marketing department decided to have 1980’s Rock ‘n Roll has-beens, Foreigner, lead off their ballpark concert series to optimistically boost attendance numbers. The band hasn’t had a hit since the ’86 Mets as Mick Jones toils like David Wright as the lone talent of their respective squads. Going back to the bands heyday, their old hits are paired with today’s Mets misses.

Blue Morning, Blue Day Any game when Mets fans go to the ballpark and discover Matt Harvey isn’t on the mound.

Cold As Ice Frontman Mick Jones mercifully rethought a change to song lyrics to Cold As Ike since he needs to keep, like the Mets, whatever fans the group has left.  Foreigner and Ike Davis are both hitting .160–the group since the ’90’s and the first baseman since April “whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

Long, Long, Way From Home Whatever manure Terry Collins spreads in the outfield on a daily basis, this song sums up any throw from left, right, or center field and what the trio fails in doing when hitting the ball.

I Want To Know What Love Is The Mets new version of Willie Montanez is Jordany Valdespin and this one’s his theme song.  From almost suffering a broken nose with a pie to the face to unanswered chin music against the Pirates, this guy wants somebody ” to show heem.

foreignerDouble Vision No need for Lasik surgery.  All Mets losses look the same no matter how many they have.

Dirty White Boy Wally Backman, period.

Hot Blooded It’s what CitiField becomes as 1/4 of the crowd realizes it isn’t Latin Merengue Night.

Urgent At the age of 41 and on his eighth MLB team, pitcher LaTroy Hawkins isn’t shy and he certainly gets around.

I Don’t Want To Live Without You David Wright for unbelievably wanting to be a Mets “lifer” and face of the franchise.

Waiting For A Girl Like You As in Lady Luck, to shine on the Mets and their fan base sometime in the very near future.

Feels Like The First Time And it will be for most of the parent club’s roster from this point forward as many newbies are called up from Las Vegas.

That Was Yesterday Or 9,729 yesterdays since the New York Mets last won the World Series.  2,432 yesterdays since Carlos Beltran froze at Adam Wainright’s breaking ball in the 2006 NLCS.

Head Games Sadly enough, the Mets would be underdogs in these games, too.

Cheer up Mets fans, you still have three and six game leads over the Astros and Marlins in the race for major league futility in this 2013 baseball season.

DJ Eberle, live from Slough, England, tomorrow.


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About Cheesy Bruin 491 Articles
A man amongst men. Cheesy Bruin kicked cancer to the curb - twice. The Cheese Man's a big, tough teddy-bear who survived the Bronx despite being an unabashed Boston Bruins fan and Sargent-At-Arms for Angry Ward's Urban Spur Posse. Nuff said. Doctors have taken most of this throat and had to make him a new tongue from thigh-meat (his own) and still he won't shut up about the Bruins, Cowboys, Pirates and Cleveland Cavaliers. And yes, his kids do love him.