James Dolan & Phil Jackson… aka The Leprechaun & Zen Master
NEW YORK, NY – Jim Dolan is a genius! Yes, he inherited the reins of Cablevision, but let’s not trivialize his desire to remake The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh right here in the Big Apple.
The 1979 basketball flick about a team wreaking in losing stench and led by a difficult star player
Moses Guthrie (Julius Erving), shows us that a little astrology, some free agents born under the Pisces and a new concept turn the team into winners!
Enter Phil Jackson… Zen Master. As promised, Phil will bring in some old Chutzpah, channeled in by his old coach, Red Holzman. The future New York triangle will create confusion for opponents and surely facilitate a long-awaited championship at MSG. Phil has been traveling the globe in search of the answers that mere rolled organics cannot bring to light.
The casting will begin at season’s end and the looming question is if Carmelo Anthony, playing under the Gemini sign, can co-exit with Jackson’s Virgo? That’s not the issue. It’s on the court stuff that matters and I have found the ballers who were born under Melo’s sign:
Nate Robinson
Dirk Nowitzki
Tracy McGrady
Udonis Haslem
Steve Novak
Al Horford
Sebastian Telfair
Peja Stojakovic
Greg Monroe
Fab Melo
This would require a complete overhaul just to align the stars around Carmelo, which most likely will not happen.
And the fate of Mike Woodson, my fellow Aries, is all but sealed… Well, doomed would be a better term, but that and other Chapters are to be written as Phil settles in.
Back to the Little Leprechaun, Jimmy Dolan. If only he can wave his shillelagh at the Rangers and oust Sather, bring back Messier and install John Davidson as GM… I cannot endure the slap shots projected my way by my New Jersey Devils-loving wife, casting verbal checks about Henrik Lundqvist – including, but not limited to, “King without a crown.”
It’s been another two decades without the Cup and we are getting mighty thirsty. So please Mr. Dolan, allow the Rangers the same opportunity with a new GM (JD), who can fix this never-ending power play that does not score! We cannot deal with a Curse of a Messier.
Another request is to slap the new Mayor de Blasio with that Irish rhythm stick for boycotting the St. Patrick’s Day Parade. I get the whole inclusion thing, but politics should not be changing a tradition of homophobia… Perhaps including the mayor’s son Dante in a small part in the remake of The Fish, will turn him around. He has the hair to pull it off.
That’s all for now, hope you liked my first foray… Please comment below and come back tomorrow for another Meet The Matts Radio episode. And if you want to see what Jimmy D doesn’t do interviews, watch this:
https://youtu.be/7DnDOTZgOpQ
