“Just when I think I’m out, they suck me back in.”
NEW YORK, NY – Rumors have it, that’s what Al Pacino was overheard saying asthe shoot for his new sports movie, Any Given Saturday, was canceled in Florida. This was as per the spiking (sports jargon) #Covid19 numbers. And really, aren’t we all getting sucked back into the promise of sports being pulled out from under us again? Segue to today’s topics/headline: MLB: Deja Flu All Over Again, Spike Covid Warms Up, RIP Philly Phanatic…
“Houston, we have a problem.“ Watch this:
Deja Flu All Over Again: You can just hear Yogi Berra saying this. I can, anyway. I he’s saying it in a Mets uniform – arguably his happiest time in baseball. But let’s get to the point – #Covid19 is alive and kicking within the MLB ranks. As the above video tells us, Houston has a problem. Colorado’s Rockies, Milwaukee’s Brewers and Philadelphi’s Phillies have all joined the Skeevats Squad with players testing positive. At this typing, 7 Phillies have tested positive. Hey, it is The City of Brotherly Love, after all…But what of Philly’s favorite mascot? Was he on the list? No. He’s dying a different death. More on that later.
Spike Covid Warms Up: All of the above could be but the tip of the iceberg. It’s not preposterous to envision hazmat medics in the bullpen to see if a Spike Johnson is really a Spike Covid. Sponsors could hop in – “They’re swabbing him now with a Johnson & Johnson Q-Tip… Speaking of Tips, keep those masks on folks!” Covid counts could take the place of pitch counts. “The Marlins have three more pitchers unavailable today, banished to the Skittles Skeevatz Station down in the rightfield corner.” But hey, these are young guys and they’re unlikely to die. Unlike…
Phony Phanatic: The city of Philadelphia has two cool things going for it, from a non-Philadelphian perspective: The historic old buildings and the Philly Phanatic. But guess what, because of money, the phunny phan phavorite is all but dead. The lime green guys is about to be replaced by P2, as it is called in court docs. It’s criminal, if you ask me. They put some Big Bird wings on him, some scales and some glasses and expect The Most Unforgiving Fan Base to simply accept the Phony Phanatic. Mind you, the people that came up with him got $215K a while back or the expiring licensing deal and want some more green, ironically. But can you believe that Philly brass is willing to spend more in legal phees to NOT pay a bit more? Two words: Owners Suck. RIP Philly Phanatic. You were the one redeeming thing about the Phillies.
That’s it. Come back tomorrow for our Most Redeeming Pundit, Cheesy Bruin.