Zeke Elliott Suspension, Aaron Hernandez’s Brain and Stupid Thursday Night Uniforms!

November 10, 2017 Junoir Blaber 0

EL BARRIO, EL FALLS  – So it is 10:30pm and I get a call from a partiall-drunk Short Matt. He needed a Friday pinch hit […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: What Board Game is Your Favorite Sports Team?

January 17, 2017 Angry Ward 24

BRONX, NY – Hey there, sports dopes, shiftless employees, and assorted other loners. It’s another wonderful Wednesday here at MeetTheMatts.com. NFL playoffs, Trump inauguration, the Knicks […]

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5 NFL Related Business Ideas: Consoling, Gun Storage, Social Media Management, Penalty Prevention, Anger Redirection

November 1, 2016 Ben Whitney 17

ALBERTA, CANADA – It’s Tuesday, time for your Weekly Dose of Whitney! Last week I discussed some of the reasons for the NFL’s declining ratings, this […]

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Presidential Candidates As Sports Teams: Who They Would Be

March 20, 2016 Cheesy Bruin 9

ZIT POP, KY – From this blemish of the smallest towns, to the schmaltzy cheese (not mine) of West Palm Beach, Presidential Candidates (or not […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Sporty Holidays to You, OJ, Murphy, 1986 Mets, Rams

December 16, 2015 Angry Ward 16

BRONX, NY – Oh man, Hanukkah is already in the books and we’re only 10 days away from Christmas. Where does the time go? As […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Matts, Mets, Pats, NFL Bets

September 9, 2015 Angry Ward 27

BRONX, NY – It’s official! I have a 2-day writing streak! Take that, Harper Lee! You’re next, Melville! There’s plenty to get to today, so […]

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Splash! Best Damn NBA Backcourt Ever and Johnny Rehab!

February 5, 2015 Fake Sandy Alderson 25

SHAKER HEIGHTS, OH  – “Thank you for asking about my stomach. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks fo’ askin’… ” A glimpse of the utter stupidity and […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Dante’s Sports Inferno – Your Guide to the 9 Circles of Hell

January 28, 2015 Angry Ward 25

BRONX, NY – It’s the neverending week before the Super Bowl, we had a faux blizzard, we’re staring down the worst month of the year (February), […]

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Cookie’s Corner: Anna Benson, A-Rod, Simon Cowell, Aaron Hernandez

August 2, 2013 Cookie 14

NEW YORK, NY – I got an email from management this morning when I woke at 4:30A (Short Matt sent it last night but I […]

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Dumb Celeb Athletes: Heed my Advice

June 27, 2013 Cam James 20

ST. LOUIS, MO – There are few things more annoying than news headlines about Athletes/Celebrities involved in gun crimes.  After weeks of speculation, Aaron Hernandez […]

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