Tag: Brodie Van Wagenen

Sports Rain Man: NY Mets, Fire Gase And RIP RBG

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EL BARRIO, EL FALLS – Happy Monday… I can’t believe it is only late September. I doubt anyone can point out to me a longer year we have ever experienced. But time has no meaning; this is the worst timeline and we need to fire the script writers for the past 9 month. Anyway, enough […]

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Angry Ward Wednesday: Todd Frazier is Back on the Mets, So You Can Kill Me Now

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BRONX, NY – The New York Mets’ 2020 season officially, and mercifully, ended on Monday when Jacob deGrom proved less-than-superhuman by taking his first loss of the season to the Marlins. But the bigger indicator that you can put a fork in Flushing baseball was a seemingly desperate and undeniably pathetic flurry of moves at […]

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Dellin Betances Paid Off By Stanks? Improbable Isles, Staff Boycott

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NEW YORK, NY – In a tipsy-topsy, crazy and wacky world… Wait, what’s that? This is a sports column and not a movie trailer, you say? Oh, I beg to differ, as the subplots exploding at every turn here in Mattville could be fodder for a film franchise rivaling the numbers of those in the […]

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Cha-Ching For Titans Tannehill, NFL Playoffs, FREE NFL Picks

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NEW YORK, NY – It’s cold outside in much of the USA, including 3 of the 4 cities with teams remaining in the NFL Playoffs. Our plan is to sit on the couch and drink some great craft beer, dip some chips in some salsa and Tweet annoying tweets to Brodie Van Wagenen, the GM […]

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Go To Blazes Carlos Beltrán, You Tommy Two Face SOB

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HELL – In this world, the Devil doesn’t wear Prada. He wears Mets orange & blue. And down here, the line to get into this very popular nightclub, Eternally Damned, is rife with the Amazins’ colors, largely for things these doomed denizens did after their failed Flushing purgatory. Case in point, Carlos Iván Beltrán – […]

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Replacement Matt: Beltran Out. Cora Ejected. Here Are Replacements

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FLUSHING, TOILET – Well lookie here, the New York Metropolitans have succumbed to pressure and agreed to [Almost] Manager Carlos Beltran stepping down in the wake of the Houston cheating scandal. Who knew? The court of public opinion is stronger than the Wilpon’s purse strings apparently. Are they actually going to pay three managers at […]

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Sports Rain Man: NY Jets Own NY, League Worst Knicks, Brodie’s Beltran

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EL BARRIO, EL FALLS – I swapped with the boss because I was so swamped with work on Friday and I had work Saturday morning. So here I am up late Sunday night because I had my birthday drinks and celebrations Saturday night and it took me all of Sunday to recover.  With that, here […]

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Big Ben: Scary Post-Halloween Sports Figures; Dave Gettleman, Sam Darnold, Brian Cashman, AJ Hinch, Mark Staal, Hank Lundqvist

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STAMFORD, CT – This Halloween we took our daughters to a “Trunk or Treat” event instead of going door-to-door like the old days. For those unfamiliar, a bunch of cars park in a parking lot and adorn their trunks with Halloween decorations. The kids just go trick or treating from car to car. It was […]

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Worst Coaching Hires In Sports History All In NY: Carlos Beltran, Take A Bow

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NEW YORK, NY – Another, Are-You-F***ing-Kidding-Me move has been made by the New York Mets, in tabbing Carlos Beltran as their new skipper. But really, with the Mets, Knickerbockers and J-E-T-S all in the same town, why should we be surprised by such a choice? Indeed, this town’s Boulevard of Bad Coaching Moves is littered […]

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Replacement Matt : Recipe of the Week

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SUBURBIA, NJ – Happy All Saints Day to my faithful fans. Today I’m here to share my recipe for the perfect hangover special, it must have cheese and egg… Okay, I kid I kid. Instead, I’m here to talk about recipes for success in sports and how my teams refuse to ever read the manual […]

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