EL BARIO, BRONX – ‘Tis a beautiful Saturday, this, the third Saturday of the first month in the Two Thousandth and Fourteenth year of his Yimness’ grace, and we gaze back at the week that was. We look at the London Nets, the Kinetic Knicks, the NFL Playoffs, the repeated NFL Mock Drafts and finally… The Polar Vortex!
Nets Beat Hawks in London – The Brooklyn Nets beat the Atlanta Hawks in Her Majesty’s Kingdom this week and hopefully both franchises had one way tickets! We know the NBA is trying to grow the brand but how do you do that by sending two of the worst teams in the league??? Apparently, the fans had a good experience; it was a fun and exciting game. But putting the words “Nets” and “exciting” in the same context normally inspires outrage, but not so in a country that is devoid of proper basketball. Further, the Nets are 3-0 in Jolly Ol’ England, which only makes keeping them there more logical! For now, though, they are back to being Brooklyn’s problem.
Indiana beats up New York – The New York Knicks got their a$$e$ handed to them by Indiana early this week. The gap between the Miami Heat and Pacers and the rest of the NBA East is about 5 revolutions of the sun wide. Sure the Knicks surprised the Heat last week, but a stopped clock is right twice a day. Could we just not bother naming an NBA All-Star team? The Eastern Conference will lose to the West and we should skip the first two rounds of playoffs and just have the two teams slug it out.
Playoffs – The worst part of the NFL Playoffs is that as the teams dwindle down, there is less to talk about. Can we stop taking every critique by a former retired star of one of the 4 teams and turning it into a headline? As for the actual games themselves, let’s be honest; if you are not a fan of any of these 4 teams, you would like the Super Bowl canceled… Seattle fans and their “We are the 12th man” shtick is really starting to grate… San Francisco is coached by Jim Harbaugh, a good coach but a great big douche… New England is the Evil Empire and led by the “Sith Lord” Bill Belichick and Tom “The Hated One” Brady… Finally, it is Peyton “I can’t Play in the Cold” Manning… I really don’t care who wins and I may just have to cancel any plans for a Super Bowl party.
Mock Drafts – When not talking about the playoffs and kissing some playoff QB’s or coach’s backsides, the banter turns to who will get picked in the upcoming draft. It is nothing but filler. No one cares. All these experts and pundits can tell you everything about JaDevon Clowney but none of these pundits can tell you with certainty when he will get picked. The Draft is not until April but expect more mock drafts and hype after the combine and we will just have to grin and bare it.
Polar Vortex! – So that crazy cold spell that we had last week is coming back next week. I thought after Snowpocalypse and Snowmageddon that the Weather Service had gotten some great PR people to start naming upcoming snow storms. The first were winter storms – Nemo – and then we had Hercules. However, I have to tip my hat to them for Polar Vortex. It just sounds so awe-inspiring and threatening. Well done National Weather Service! You have outdone yourselves. But I will still hate you when it is colder than hell next week.