SACREMENTO, CA – It took us until yesterday to learn (we previously didn’t care) why California is referred to as The Golden State. It’s because it’s bone dry and the grass turns yellow as a result – unless you’re violating a seemingly unenforced city ordinance/moral obligation that is promoted with “If it’s yellow, let it mellow, if it’s brown, flush it down,” ads. In other words, if your grass is green in California and/or you flush your pee, you are a self-serving, jerky poop-head. But West Coast Droughts is not the category today, Alex, so let’s get to it. And let’s get to it with another Alex – Alex Rodriguez, to be exact, and David Wright.
We’re certain a bunch of you recall – way back in the early days of Spring Training – our then-mocked proposal of trading David Wright for Alex Rodriquez and cash. Many of you giggled. Others flipped us the the bird. (Watch the clip for an explanation of that action).
Well, how does that proposal look now, #Mets fans?! Those of you that poo-poohed our trade idea now look a bit like the Italian nitwit that told Columbus the world was flat. Once again, we were right: The world is round and David Wright should have been traded for anything – especially a then-worthless, albatross of a player, Alex Rodriguez.
To be fair, we wanted the trade to go through mainly because it would fill holes for both teams: the Yanks would get an 800lb Korak off their hands and the Metsies would have a 2nd bona fide Major Leaguer on their roster – one that has defied all logic and hit the ball like he was on something… now hold on, thar! We know nothing!
But how much would the National League team – the Senior Circuit Squad – have benefited from having a simultaneously recalcitrant/resurgent A-Roid on their squad? Simple. They’d be in first place by 3-5 games and have an asset other than a young pitcher to draw fans to Shea Field.
As for the Yanks, they’re used to swallowing bad contracts for players that can’t play and would just have been tickled to get rid of the biggest disgrace in their history. That’s right – biggest disgrace in their history.
But no, that would have made sense. And if anything, we know for certain that when it comes down to what’s transpired with Alex Rodriguez and David Wright – NOTHING MAKES SENSE.
That’s all for now, tune in tomorrow for huge A-Rod supporter Different Matt, who was seen streaking at a USA Rugby Eagles match, tomorrow.
P.s… Check out this picture of Short Matt laying down on the job.
