NEW YORK, NY – Is there such a thing as it being “too hot to write?” Because I think it should be. Sure, Hemingway would slap my face, but no one ever compared me to Hemingway… except in the departments of drinking and misery. Anyway, it was 100-friggin-degrees in NYC Tuesday, and that’s not even close to what it feels for those navigating city asphalt. When the weather is this oppressively scorching, people eat lighter. Today, I’m gonna write lighter.
Rodgers Pretty Sure This Will Be Final NFL Season. Kudos, once again, to Aaron Rodgers for managing to help generate one of the most Aaron Rodgers headlines ever. Those of you who don’t think he’s “still got it” need only look at this to see he’s in MVP form when it comes to being the NFL’s International Man of Mystery Doofus Extraordinaire. Can’t wait for the season to start.
Let’s Go Mets! No, Really, Let’s Go Already. Because I’m a glutton for physical and mental punishment, I went to the Mets/Braves game Monday night. Actually, we had family in town and we all bought tickets weeks ago. Aside from sweating like extras in the final scene of Apocalypse Now, we were all treated to warm beer and mediocre baseball. For those of you who don’t know, the Mets have a utility player named Jared Young who looks like—and hits like—a substitute biology teacher. There have to be better players in the farm system or on an actual farm somewhere. C’mon, Mets, you can do better. Can’t you?
Bring Back Movie Double Features! These oppressive temps did actually bring up some good memories. As I texted a friend yesterday: “Growing up, this was the type of day that called for a nice, dark, air-conditioned movie theater, and a double feature.” There are such days as “too hot for the beach or pool,” and the movies always came through like a champ. Parents were more than happy to fork over some dough and tell the kids to scram for 4-5 hours. Best double feature I ever say was The Jerk and The Blues Brothers at the now long-defunct Dale movie theater in the Bronx. What was the best you ever saw?
And with that question, I’m done for today. I’m not actually going fishing, but in my mind today’s headline is accurate.
Come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz, who’ll once again be moaning about a team that has won 27 World Series championships.
