Angry Ward Wednesday: Tiger Trouble, Mariners Moron Mather, Mr. Met vs Taijuan Walker

Kevin-Mather, MLB, Spring Training, Tajuan Walker, Mr Met, Tiger-Woods, Meet-The-Matts, Ward-Calhoun, Angry_Ward

BRONX, NY – Like pretty much always, I did not come here today intending to write about golf, and I’ll still not try to dwell on it too much. But, after hearing the news about Tiger Woods’ single-car crash in LA and some still-vague information about his resulting injuries, I feel I have to at least mention it.

By the time this column posts, we may know a whole lot more [update] about the incident and the injuries. I guess for starters, from the sounds of it, he’s lucky to be alive. He, his family, and his legion of fans should all be very thankful for that. It’s been reported that he was having multiple surgeries on his legs. Whether this is correct or not, it would certainly seem that Tiger’s professional golf career is over. He was already struggling mightily with back issues, and his return to the tour was always iffy. Barring a miraculous, bigger than Alex Smith rehab and comeback, this accident all but assures that his playing days are over. It’s a scary and sad coda to an incredible career but, again, at least he’s alive. Let’s move on to something else.

Kevin Mather’s Toxic Blather. Seattle Mariners President and CEO Kevin Mather recently sent his career to Davy Jones’ Locker by spewing some truly idiotic ramblings in front of a Bellevue (fittingly), Washington Rotary Club. First off, how are Rotary Clubs still a thing? Seems like something Robert Young would have to attend on Father Knows Best. Back to Mather. This dope stuck more feet in his mouth than Rex Ryan ever enjoyed. He blasted a former pitcher/current team advisor of Japanese descent for needing an interpreter, said of the Mariners top minor league prospect “his English is not tremendous,” told the group that the club’s veteran leader Kyle Seager was “overpaid,” and then copped to wanting to keep top minor leaguers (including former Met Jarred Kelenic) in the minors so the team could control them longer. It never ceases to amaze me how many painfully-stupid white guys ascend to positions of power. How Mather stayed off the Mets’ broken hiring radar is yet another mystery.

Legalize Sports Gambling Already! Speaking of dense white dudes, legalizing marijuana and sports gambling in the United States is proving more difficult than getting a rover to Mars. And here we are with a rover ON Mars, and still people are wringing their hands over pot and point spreads. If there’s one distraction I could’ve used during this pandemic, it would have been the ability to stroll down to my local newsstand and bet on a football, basketball, or hockey game as easily as people bet on random numbers with much longer odds. I know I’ve beat this dead horse here before, but my therapist tells me I have to continue to find ways and places to funnel my considerable anger. This site has proven to be as good an empty canyon as any to yell into, and for that I’m grateful. Let’s get one last item in.

Tajuan Takes Another Number. New Mets pitcher Taijuan Walker was planning on wearing #00 this year, but that number belongs to Mr. Met. So, he’s wearing Turk Wendell’s old 99 instead. Like Wendell, maybe Walker will become a fan favorite.

Speaking of fan favorites, come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz, who may have been among the fans that returned to Madison Square Garden last night.

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About Angry Ward 736 Articles
Angry Ward, who has admirers at the New York Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but for one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way Nancy Pelosi embraces Mitch McConnell at charity events. And while his Vikings only tease him with success, his Golden State Warriors actually win these days. A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, "The Franchise." (Junoir Blaber disputes this). Vent, curse and giggle with him on Angry Ward Wednesdays.