Some Overdue Corrections: Kirk Cousins, NASCAR, Joe Namath, Chiefs and Carmen Sandiego?

OMAHA, NBWhere in the world is Carmen Sandiego? This was the most difficult question for an entire generation’s childhood. Where’s Waldo? If you couldn’t figure that out then you were probably blind. Who framed Roger Rabbit?  That’s easy.  Watch the movie. Do you really want to hurt me? Yes.  Everyone wants to hurt the Culture Club Are you afraid of the dark? Well that depends on the episode. Prior to the invention of the internet our lives were filled with suspense because the answers weren’t available at our fingertips in real time. The black hole of a screen in which you all stare, whilst empowering dolts like myself, has created a psychological void amongst our society.  Instead of seeking answers, the average Joe has taken for granted that the answers to most questions are in fact available and need not be questioned.

The bugaboo of this status quo is that it is not a matter of if you find an answer, but a matter of which answer you find, or in most cases which answer is presented.  More often than not a presented answer inherits the credibility of the source and subsequently becomes a perceived truth.  This has created a media race to establish institutional credibility as opposed to preserving institutional integrity.  Simply put, two diametrically opposed entities can report the same thing at the same time, with two fundamentally differing viewpoints, and both audiences will believe or perceive their preferred source as the correct version of the truth.

In days of yore when institutional integrity was paramount, the correction was the most humble way of retaining credibility.  Admitting when you are wrong and clearing the air was not only an honorable act of journalism, it was expected.  Today corrections don’t exist as they would counter the rhetoric of the outlet.  I have no rhetoric.  All I have is my integrity.  Thus I need to issue a few corrections from my decade of indentured servitude.  Yeah… It’s been a damn decade.

Cam “Waldo” James answers THAT question.
Previous Statements I Need to Correct:
The Chiefs will go undefeated this year.
This is not true.  In fact it wasn’t true before the season when I said it. They lost the Super Bowl which occured this year back in February. They will however win the upcoming Super Bowl.  (future correction to be issued in January)
Kirk Cousins is the best QB in the NFL
This is not true.  He is, however, the best QB in the NFC.  He is also the greatest QB to ever play the game not named Joe Namath or Patrick Mahomes.
NASCAR is a sport.
This is not true.  #NASCAR is a spectator sport.  If you haven’t been to a race you need to go.  There is no greater automotive racing than the rush from the parking lot to the White Castle or Krystal drive through.  That being said, Formula 1 and all other auto racing wherein turning left AND right is required is a sport.
The Olympics are a sham.
This is not true. In order to be a sham there has to be deception.  There is no longer any deception as it pertains to the Olympics.  The upcoming winter Olympics in China are being held in a location that does not have enough natural snow to actually have a real ski season.  To add insult to injury, the “Chinese Downhill’ isn’t an event.
Lastly, I am the prognosticator of prognosticators.
This is not true.  I can however accurately predict that this column is over and Management’s edits will distort my words to its liking, which inherently proves the first half of this column correct.
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About Cam James 128 Articles
Cam James hails from Missouri and is a down-the-line St. Louis fan: Rams, Cards, Blues... Thus his occasional "Ram Rules" column. He hates Kansas basketball, lives in Denver, been a wrestler, dabbled in Ultimate Fighting and plays hardball. Oh, and he's Opie Taylor white.